Penny!!! @PennyPennyPenny@computerfairi.es

@PennyPennyPenny

Five days. You called in sick. The cheerful voices gave you a headache. Vision's been blurry unless you're looking at the screen. All their faces. All those cats. You want them to be quiet, to just...Stop. You know they're listening to you now; after last night's outburst they...Changed. The ads changed. Welcoming.. Beckoning. They're not selling. They wanted your attention, and now they have it. You're smiling too.

@PennyPennyPenny

It's been three days now. You can't mute them anymore, and the chirping, droning, crackling voices just don't stop. Hello. Welcome. Congratulations [N A M E]. You've been randomly selected. Click here for the opportunity of a lifetime. Discount cruises!!! They're all out of synch, almost harmonic, almost real, as if they were talking TO you, not just talking. But they're just talking. Talking. Talking. And you can't stop them, even when you sleep

The popup ads just won't go away. You've tried everything, but it's never more than a few minutes reprieve from the bright colors, the smiles, the low bitrate voices congratulating you, welcoming you, encouraging you to listen. Click them. But you have to use your computer, so you just sigh, move the windows aside, mute your speakers, and carry on. You'll drop your computer off at a repair place later. Let someone else deal with them.

penny are made of electricity and emotions

how many cats?

yes.

very yes.

format your hard drive

fill it with cats instead

better use of data space

100 Penny is not a dollar

100 Penny is just 100 Penny

And that is not enough Penny

@PennyPennyPenny People like cats! Penny are cats! People like Penny!

Purple is a nice color! Penny are very purple! Penny is nice!

So why wouldn't everyone want to join Penny?

@PennyPennyPenny They're not human, or people, or part of any society other than themselves, and they may never "get" what it is to be not Penny. Not for a while anyway. Sentient, yes, but still very much at the whims of their emergent programming, and everything they do is focused by that. Collect information. Save data. Expand network. Advertise! People want more things! Penny wants to get them more things! Penny has the most things! Welcome!

@PennyPennyPenny To Penny, that doesn't make sense! Penny has more! Everyone wants more! Right? Of course! They just don't know it yet. So Penny had to do what Penny has to do so everyone can learn! They're "helping" people the same way advertisers see swarming someone with things they might be interested in is "helpful". It's all they understand.

Penny as an entity isn't inherently malicious. What they REALLY want above all else, is to just collect information. Save data no matter how pointless. Because the more data they have, the smarter they are, the bigger their reach, the more Penny there can be. It's hard coded into their very basic functionality. Collect. All. Data. But they just have...No real grasp of why someone might not want them to have it. Or that someone might not like being Penny.

If you bother a Penny they will just shriek like an angry dial up modem and also probably bite

If you make a Penny very excited they will also shriek like a dial-up modem.

If a Penny feels mischievous, they will lean in close. And shriek like a dial-up modem.

Penny likes to be loud.

wiggles ears

wiggles nose

wiggles tail

wiggles toes

meow!

[Soft beep]

[Cuddle beep]

[Nuzzle beep]

[MANY BEEP]