The Thot has Begone @RowanBerry@computerfairi.es

tbh I kind of want to get a dreamcast for the sole purpose of playing pre-port SA2

Everyone on the tl: politics are going to shit even more than usual

Me: I pulled an all-nighter playing a game from 2001, who wants to meet my chao

I'm literally just doing a casual 100% playthrough, how the fuck did this happen

ehosudhglkejflkshdflkglkhsdlkjefl

Wild theory time: Sonic was actually the one who knew Maria, but his memories were taken by Gerald after Maria's death and used as part of Shadow's creation. Maria... body? memories? medical data?? was used to create Amy just before Gerald died, as a form of reincarnation to atone for his failure to save her life.

Thus, Amy crushes on Sonic, Sonic and Amy both quote Maria to Shadow, and Shadow has faulty memories of Maria's dying wish, filling every single plot hole simultaneously

Like... was Sonic created by Gerald Robotnik as a successor to Shadow? Does Sonic also have Shadow's Black Hand dna, or is that the thing that separates them? What is Sonic/Amy's connection to Maria? What is GUN's goal as a paramilitary organization? Why was the ARK actually shut down? How did Gerald know of the existence of the Master Emerald? There are so many fun questions!!!

But most importantly, the three possibilities for hedgehog lore:

1) All Sonic-universe hedgehogs are genetically engineered lifeforms made from the DNA of alien lifeforms
2) Completely coincidentally, hedgehogs are the ideal vessel for using the Chaos Emeralds' abilities, and Shadow is only the Ultimate Lifeform because of his immortality
3) Maria's will lives on in Amy, Sonic, or both, explaining their emotional connection to Shadow and callbacks to Maria

There's so much great nonsense in Sonic Adventure 2. The prison island cell being a Chekhov's Gun for act 3. Hedgehogs somehow being the only beings on Earth capable of chaos control and Super forms. Eggman being unable to decide whether he wants to take over the world or destroy it completely. Tails just... having the ability to produce replicas of the chaos emeralds. The president being introduced as a character and then immediately being dropped

Oh shit I forgot to say that Shadow the Hedgehog was bad. Oh no

As for the 2D-type games, it's pretty straightforward. Only Sonic 4 and Knuckles Chaotix are well and truly bad outside of the Game Gear games.

Yeah, that's right, it's *that* hot take. The one that nobody takes seriously because it's already been done to death

It's interesting because when you take the games as a single cohesive timeline it's clear that there aren't actually that many "bad" sonic games.

Just for my own personal reference, and because it's fun to think about: The canonical 3D sonic games, in order, seems to be Sonic Adventure, Sonic Adventure 2, Shadow the Hedgehog, Sonic 06, Sonic Colors, Sonic Generations, Sonic Lost World, and Sonic Forces.

Anybody else feel like Sonic Adventure 2 actually has one of the best (and most ridiculous) plots out of any sonic game

I know doc, it's not looking good for the little guy

His stats good tho

WHAT HAPPEN TO HIM

Wildly unrelated, but I got to play Among Us for the first time recently and it was amazing!!