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christianity, bdsm 

friendly reminder that since crucifixion at the time was typically done using an X-shaped structure, the historically accurate way to represent jesus' death is using st andrew's cross

robosting 

A display known as "valeting the car" is popular among self-possessed and prideful automata: in response to a rude gesture or shout, one simply chases down the offending car (given the relative power/weight ratios, this rarely takes longer than a second or two), lifts it out of traffic by its undercarriage, and carefully places it in the nearest unoccupied parking space before vanishing into the night.
this does not usually damage the vehicle, but does rather get the point across.

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robosting 

Catcalling quickly became a thing of the past when humanoid robots became a sizable demographic in cities.
It's one thing to shout at a lone, slow human who won't remember you, but when there's a chance that someone you think is human may actually be a terrifyingly fast and strong machine with a perfect photographic memory, it's a different story.

This understanding was reached quickly after a few extremely short and violent chase incidents made the news.

horseshoe crabs are the FORTRAN matrix lib that hasn’t been updated in 45 years because it never needed an update of the animal world

that weird combination of genderfeels that's like: "i'm girl???" + [definitely not girl] + "why we had to take shower am fire" + "fuck you i'm a girl" + I Do Not Want To Gend Right Now + gonna gend so hard y'all u have no idea + shit what was i thinking about + today i will trans Extra Hard because i Can + random bits of dysphoria for seasoning

Your privacy is *very* important to us.

Not quite as important as us having all your data. But pretty important. On a scale of one to ten, your privacy ranks a solid four.

You can rest assured that - after we've scanned and processed and extracted every last bit of commercial advantage out of your data - the bitter, tarry residue left gumming up the cogs of our machine will be treated in full compliance with the best privacy legislation laundered money can buy.

And that's a promise.

my gender is like one of those chemical things where you heat it up and it just grows a gigantic tentacled horror out of nothing

*slaps roof of Cambridge* this bad boy can fit so many Massachusetts Institute of Technologies in it

*Me, arriving, kit on my shoulders*
My friends: Did... You carry her all the way here?
Me: Uuuh yeah, you think my girlfriend should fucking have to WALK???

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They used wood charcoal, broken pottery, bones, ashes, compost and other materials to create what settlers called "Terra preta." At first whites didn't credit the indigenous people with making this soil. They thought it was volcanos or brought in by river flooding. But it was the people, and they had been doing it since 450 BC. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terra_pr

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Ordinary Chinese readers and translators united to help me remove all censorship from the mainland edition of my first book, entitled《永久记录》. Now we're making it available it to the world for free. Please download and share it everywhere. Link: t.co/7f6djtUYW7 t.co/R16nHelBJ6

recommended cis holidays (continued):

• Cisgender Day of Not Using the Word "Brave" (it's just one day! y'all can do it!)
• Cisgender Day of Liking All Your Trans Kid's Selfies on Facebook
• Cisgender Day of Just Correcting Yourself and Moving On When You Fuck Up Somebody's Pronouns
• Cisgender Retail Employees' Day of Not Giving a Shit Who's In Your Store Buying What, a Sale's a Sale
• Cisgender Day of Crushing on a Trans Person Because They're Hot and Not Worrying About Why
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recommended cisgender holidays:

• Cisgender Day of Not Making This Entirely About Sex
• Cisgender Day of Not Making This Entirely About Gender Roles
• Cisgender Day of Not Making This Entirely About You
• Cisgender Day of Going With Your Trans Friend to the DMV
• Cisgender Day of Taking Your Trans Friend Shopping But Not As a Trans Thing Just As a Friend Thing And With Full Acceptance That This Might Mean Spending Time in the Plus Size or Kids Sections Because Clothes and Shoes Are Tricky
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partial list of trans holidays:

• Transgender Day of Remembrance
• Transgender Day of Visibility
• Transgender Day of Paperwork
• Transgender Day of Explaining This Shit To Your Parents, Again
• Transgender Day of Dealing With Medical Insurance (formerly part of TDoP but it got too big)
• Transgender Day of Seeing Another Trans Person at the Coffee Shop But They Don't Have Any Openly Trans Signifiers and What Are You Gonna Say To Them Anyway, Hi, I'm Trans Too, How's It Going
• Halloween
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Computer Fairies is a Mastodon instance that aims to be as queer, friendly and furry as possible. We welcome all kinds of computer fairies!