pedophilia, sexual abuse
https://medium.com/survivors/the-stages-of-sexual-grooming-every-parent-should-know-6e98fb444f9f
Reading this article and realizing that I was groomed very incompetently as a child. They forgot the step where the child has to not fucking hate you for being a perv.
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pedophilia, sexual abuse
I was not conscious of hating them for being pervy.
I just didn't like them touching my butt all the time, staring at me dreamily, grabbing me to kiss me, and demanding they be allowed to wash me or come into the bathroom while I was trying to use the toilet.
In my child-brain, with no concept of perviness, this was just them being a loathsome and annoying person I didn't want anywhere near me.
pedophilia, sexual abuse
Sometimes I wonder why I get so frightened and avoidant when people show romantic/sexual attention to me, and then I remember my adoptive family just shrugged their shoulders and let this person stay in my life for two decades.