orthogonal to alive @avi@computerfairi.es

Time for the "Stop recommending I reconnect with abusive shitheads" challenge!

Lasagna Cat was good

I'm not saying that drug addiction can't be very harmful to people and relationships, but it is also a medical and a psychological issue, whereas the garbage I am finding is acting like 1) all drug addiction is equivalent to abusing people and 2) if you are addicted you are being willful. It's very conservative and DARE in its outlook.

A lot of this shit is also about drug addiction, in a way that's very shaming and ignorant. It's conflating drug addiction with abuse, blaming drug addicts for being addicted, and blaming their support network for "allowing" the addiction to continue.

What about teachers who see bruises on kids and turn a blind eye? What about churches that shuffle around pedophile priests? What about police departments that vehemently protect racist cops?

Those, to me, are the enablers.

Idk I just think there's a major difference between someone covering up abuse to save face when they are not being harmed by it...and someone constantly appeasing their abuser because they are terrified of being hurt or killed.

/shrug emoji

A lot of online writing on enabling is basically blaming victims for "enabling" the other person to abuse them.

It's not about people who are a third party to the abuse; who encourage the abuse to continue and support the abuser while being out of harm's way.

So the advice is worst than worthless, because it blames people for being trapped in abusive relationships.

I'm so tired of this shit.

What do you do with enablers? People who value unity over setting boundaries, and downplay abuse, insisting you give people 1000th second chances?

My family is like, "It makes [x] sad that they can't emotionally abuse you now that you've cut off all contact from them. It would really mean a lot if you let them back into your life now that you are happy and successful without them."

Calvin & Hobbs & Shaw

Hot take: I like skunky cheap beer. Gimme that 2.50 Beck's 22 oz

This is a very free country that just worships murderous figurehead presidents

Ok, doing that took me 50 minutes, and now I've successfully passed the 4 week course.

The quizzes mostly covered stuff I already knew, and when they didn't, it wasn't enough material to fail me.

I'm just going to poke at the videos where they seem interesting, and do the weekly quizzes, because I already know most of this stuff.

Ugh...but it's a prereq for the courses I actually want...