As I've been a lot better lately, I've been wanting to do a series of reflection for a while now.
And I should have started already because now it feels a bit like it's slipping away again.
Recovery is work. It's so tempting to just go and take on projects when I'm fine for a bit and it's necessary, too. It's also necessary to not forget to take care of myself and my human needs. Being happy is always more important than accomplishing anything.

Today I noticed that it's not actually that important what I do. Usually I agonize about whether I should do a thing/ go to a place, or not.
But maybe my mindset is more important. Trying to do the thing super fast or super well is usually stressful. But just going at it slowly and remembering that it is not all that important is a way I can do the thing. Trying to have fun doing it is even better.
(today the thing is cleaning, which I'm doing rn)

I still wish there was a quick easy fix every time I feel worse.
There isn't.
And that kind of thinking is a trap.
The things that feel like a quick fix are most likely things that will keep me from being in touch with myself and even make things worse.

Typical trap I fall into again and again : when I'm low on energy I try to focus on enduring, functioning, just getting by. Which ends up draining me more.
What helps is trying to prioritize feeling good. Find something I like, something fun, something that serves no purpose at all, that is just for me. That is a way to feel alive.