Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

@vamp i'd recommend maybe setting up a 'walled garden' for him of sorts - like if there's an interest or activity y'all share, have an account dedicated to that. like uhhh - fuck idk what 11 year olds like these days - 'our minecraft builds' or suchlike. that way if you're sharing the account, that's the perfect reason to kinda guide him through interactions, check in on things (with him being aware he's being checked on), and do little learning moments on the way there.

@vamp i think the law is your easy out here: COPPA
means it has to be 13 or up, unless the person running whatever social media has explicit signed permission, on paper, otherwise. that's in USA, many are more strict.

personally i remember hitting the internet at age 12, and looking back, i know that i had a hell of a lot of "there but for the grace of god go i" moments. make sure you're going to be putting him in a community of people who *will* look after him in an avuncular fashion, tbh.

note that the peripera water tints are actually very good, it's just that they are not kidding about the tint part. like, y'all, they do not fuck around in the pigment department. "haha it's like water it's going to be at least a little dilute" My Friend It Is Not!

they last a long time and are amazingly effective but i also always end up with my fingertips dyed the same color in the process of trying to get it on my lips in the right spots so

makeup in sephora: eyeliner sharp enough to kill. assert yourself with red. become the very picture of listless and grim models who do not smile because of laugh lines. serious makeup. for serious people.

asian beauty, in the distance: hey yo y'all want some makeup in a fukin' uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh miniature fridge

me: MINIATURE FRIDGE????? OH BOY WOULD I!!!!!!!

@Lexi@octodon.social okay that last bit wasn't actually relevant advice in any way but like. tiny fridge full of makeup, how can i NOT lose my shit

@Lexi@octodon.social yeah!! i actually LOVE my canmake stuff. https://www.canmake.com/en/ is their english website as well. for other asian brands i've bought them through yesstyle, which has come through fantastically every time.

also you can get shit like peripera's mini fridge, and this isn't quite no-makeup makeup - i haven't figured out how to work the water tints well honestly LOL - but like. check this shit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DM6bNUAxM4 FUUUUCK IT'S MAKEUP IN A TINY FRIDGE FUCK YES

@Lexi@octodon.social they're not too absurd on amazon (which is through the one official reseller of canmake to the US, they are extra proud of this and send every package with that certification plus some goodies, usually a sample) and it's a bit goofy but i. love. their. packaging. it's all very princessy and i ADORE that.

their catalogues also have diagrams of things like... plotting all their blushes in terms of lots of color/sheer color on one axis and staying powder on the other.

@Lexi@octodon.social uuugh yeah. i admit i haven't fully figured out how to conquer my PCOS beard with makeup.

but it's definitely the right season to try that 'no makeup makeup' too! in summer i think everyone goes a little lighter on the makeup anyway.

the one brand i wanted to rec is canmake! they're a japanese brand that is apparently very popular among like college-age kids. i've loved the stuff i've gotten from them - some blushes, stay-on balm lip rouge, lip jam, etc.

so i found a buzzfeed article of "gifs to retire in 2014".

what do y'all recon, a few more years in the cellar before they're of a proper vintage? https://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/19-gifs-we-should-all-retire-in-2014

@Alyx LOL don't actually feel bad in the least, i am taking a moment to mercilessly make fun of myself

i am a 1950's housewife screaming in absurd terror as she stands on top of the table except there are no mice, there are only chemistry problems

every time hardcore chemistry shows up on my dash i need y'all to imagine me giving a comedic shriek before tossing my laptop away from me in the most hilarious manner possible

@Lexi@octodon.social (also it's an excuse to look at and buy new makeup which is uhhhhhh pretty fun lol)

@Lexi@octodon.social just cruising on by here a second, feel free to tell my cishet ass to gtfo -

maybe it's an opportunity to play with some "no-makeup makeup" :> i know nyx has actually put out some cool stuff along those lines, and a lot of asian beauty follows that ethos (tinted moisturizer and bb creams over foundations, etc).

you could have some fun experimenting with that "you, but better" makeup kinda look and see if the part of brain that wants to yell likes it better?

if anyone needs me, i gotta go have Southern Girl Who Read Too Much Miss Manners In Middle School the vapors,

because a friend just told me that she just saw, at her aunt's funeral, a pageant queen arrive wearing her crown and sash. for the whole thing. to the funeral. the whole fucking funeral. crown. sash. at. at a funeral. a Funeral. A FUNERAL

"harp, did you just delete and redraft that just to shove your nonsense in a tag?"

.... yea

yes, i am, truly, back on my bullshit, having written now two more The Secret World/Secret World Legends style lore entries for #ffxiv characters - https://docs.google.com/document/d/1SASpPpX65A--A1olxd6siy40YYd7ce18FTUSXYUFZk4/edit?usp=sharing

also shoutout to google's spellcheck helping me correct miqo'te and ala mhigo, good on you for that though i'm slightly confused how y'all got that in the dictionary