Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

i feel EXTREMELY PLEASED with my adulting skills today

oh man i just realized i miswrote shit last night lmao. not on tumblr, on reddit.

which makes being cishet sherpa getting someone up the mountain to "perhaps you're not cishet" base camp EVEN WEIRDER HONESTLY

my dad brought home valentine's day gifts (roses for my mom, and a balloon for me to not feel left out lol) and my dog has been

incredibly

suspicious

balloons are a MENACE that MUST BE STOPPED, she would like you to know!

these are the punitive cuddles after i dared to move the balloon to show her that balloons are not evil #dogsofmastodon #hollypls

ngl it feels very weird to be cishet sherpa up enby mountain but hey

i expect to get a lot of "nooooo whaaaat noooooooo those only exist as obnoxious tumblrinas!!!!" but i'm still gonna plant that seed for in about, oh idk *looks at watch* 3 months to 5 years, i expect that this poster is going to wake up at 3am and just kinda go

"god fucking dammit that reddit motherfucker might be RIGHT"

well, it's been a strange 24 hours on tumblr

i go in fencing with a sealion for far too long, somehow end up gilded for it (!), and now, after sorting through some whoops-i-thought-you-were-another-poster-sorry aggro

here i am

gently telling someone that if they think of their mind as non-gendered, and if they want to be treated as neither male nor female, that... it might be symptoms of being nonbinary, actually

hap valemtimes #splatoon2

honestly part of the fun of listening to advice shows/reading advice columns is when they fucking beef it

but WOW, the third letter on the dear prudence podcast

that guest REALLY had a critical compassion failure in her answer and i'm really hoping that after they wrapped recording, daniel ortberg was able to go "hey, listen, that was very not cool what you did back there"

you know what's a good meme? that one where abba's mamma mia goes with fight scenes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WI6EyXSN1nI

on one hand, i just got a second gold for this post fucking hell reddit (that's pretty cool)

on the other hand, someone just mansplained bre'r rabbit to me

or maybe yankeesplained

i'm coining the word yankeesplain for this

i am slightly confused as to why i, the token cishet, just got a gold on reddit for a comment defending trans folk, but like

i'm definitely taking it

it's ultimately meaningless internet points but i do sort of feel like howl the wizard. oooh shiny star. lemme just. c h o m p there now it's inside me forever NO TAKEBACKS

another accidental luxurious experience:

if you use a scented top coat on your nose, and then pick your nose...

major upgrade

i just accidentally invented a luxurious experience by putting my handcream near the laptop vent so it was warm instead of cold when i put it on

GOD HELP US ALL, THE HORSES HAVE LEARNED HOW TO VAPE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb7S4JYvWmI

i impulse-bought some kitty paw joystick covers that are just a wee tiny smidge too big for the switch joysticks

however, i regret exactly nothing about my purchase

look at how cute. loooooook

i mean, the circus theme can fuck right off. i don't know why they went with circus music. makes me want to shake the designer by the shoulders and yell STOP CHEAPENING YOUR IDEAS AND PRODUCT

but 'veil held up by balloons' actually... looks interesting? like. i'm down. i cannot tell a lie, i am down with that. it's completely over the top, but the way it moves is cool.