Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

Look At Him, Look At My Favourite Garbage Murderdad

Behold This Utter Terrifying Trash Fire (i chant as i post more au darth vader)

i'm actually mildly terrified that the next commission i get of vader from my au fanfic, some sort of DILF singularity will occur, and i will be crushed by an oncoming wave of people way too hornt for him due to artists just being way too good at delivering that vibe

source: see following comms by minttu, takens, and hoiist

cws for eye contact and a bit of blood

sorry everyone it's real darth vader hours

i feel like in the interests of expediency for communicating the essential aspect of his character, the next commission i get of my pet-fanfic-version darth vader/anakin skywalker should just be like

him painted over this

if you've never seen the episode of the muppet show where mark hamill guest stars PLEASE do so, it is a joy and a gift

my favourite is that mark hamill plays himself being really excited to be there but gets CONSTANTLY PUSHED OUT OF THE LIMELIGHT BY HIS JERK COUSIN LUKE SKYWALKER

please, i beg you, someone out there who has #yakuza and some 3d posing software and/or time for fanart. PLEASE recreate this trend but it's haruka quietly dying of embarrassment as kiryu yeets himself skyward in full ministry of silly walks pose https://imgur.com/gallery/9zMjljf

i mean i make that joke but i also know enough about myself that although i wouldn't hold a puppy gender reveal party, mostly because i intend to adopt where there's not much fanfare about that part,

i totally would throw a puppy shower aka baby shower equivalent aka "everyone come over and look at my cute dog" party

i know it's a stolen joke but it's also so true and i think of it often:

they say there's not really such a thing as white culture, but i would beg to disagree

'cos we don't have anybody but ourselves to blame for puppy gender reveal parties.

mfw slate.com's article about 'new affordable eye cream that really works' is 55 fucking dollars

phew lordy that was an easy block of a new person rolling in to follow me

i guess at least they make it easy by only retooting how they're mad about how it's a shame there are now petite weeb girls to flirt with

fuck me, my ear and throat are now REALLY screaming

don't know quite which is which, sweet oil didn't help the ear, so next up is some numbing throat spray. ugh

i figured that a pattern had been set so my nissan is named

Bundy.

not because of any sort of particular adulation or honor, but mostly because car names are like dog names: you really want something you can easily shout in frustration or elation depending on circumstances, and "bundy" is excellently shoutable

so my family names their cars

my first car was a little white car (a volvo). my mom's first car was also a little white car (tho not a volvo). it was named Sam.

she told me this and i immediately said "oh well, mine must be Son of Sam then of course".

then my volvo bravely died in service after somebody hit my mom while she drove it and literally truncated my car (my mom was fine tho), so...

my first one (that was really Mine) was an emachines pc got on special on black friday; i stood in line like 30 minutes before best buy opened in the pre-sunrise dark with my mom so we could grab it

the theme for computers on our network was currently grecoroman mythology so i named it Eos, after the rosy-fingered goddess of the dawn, because i got up so fucken early in the morning to get it lmao