Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

sometimes you just gotta uhhhhhh https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BsW9G4jM1-LR0JUbNfmy6I--xAhw7AjXMJtnNtJPX18/edit?usp=sharing stop doing msq on your alt in #ffxiv to cough up a bit of story like a cat horks up a hairball

OK THIS IS DEFINITELY THE BEST NAME I'VE SPOTTED IN THE WILD TODAY

ok so it's probably the problem is that menstrual blood is way more basic and the delicate fucking rainforest that is my ladygarden is acidic, but either way, SHIT'S WONKY. I'M UNCOMFORTABLE. AND I WISH I HAD THE BUDGET TO IMPULSE-BUY A BIDET RIGHT NOW, AND MAYBE ONE OF THOSE LITTLE SILICONE SPATULAS TO SCRAPE THE CLOTS ON OUT

if i had more spoons i would go scrape out one of the clots (because my period is deciding to be eerily light right now, meaning there is no deluge to actually move the clots along, which is basically hell) and see if we have any ph testing strips in the darkroom because if you told me my period blood was approximately the same ph as gastric acid i'd absolutely believe you based on how it feels

davalia_learns_dragoon_jump.gif #ffxiv

bunny is now DRAGOON BUNNY

1. we all know folques didn't shuffle back off that cliff. davalia made him into elezen kebab. then punted him off the edge.

2. before yeeting himself into the sky like superman, estinien absolutely looked at her and went "holy shit. she's so fucking angry. this bunny is fucking PISSED. what was her name? davalia THOUSANDFOE? fuck, that's metal as hell. yeah ok she can be a dragoon i guess."

3. davalia wants to know how to swipe left on any roused eyes, thanks

hopefully soon servers will open to new characters and i can enact my new viera alt

Really'big Carbuncle

(and i only got proper mad at him when he laughed it off, and had multiple other classes at level cap, and said that he COULD go buy gear but he wasn't gonna.)

anyway the moral of the story is that as proud as i am of being a mentor at times i have also been quite happy to turn off the burger king crown

i will say though that to keep it even, the maddest i've ever got in-game with my mentor crown on was at a german player

i made sure to absolutely scald his ears via google translate in a polite "disappointed pre-k teacher" way

(he was queued as tank and came into a dungeon in wildly inappropriate gear - like, caster stuff 25 levels out of date - and then wanted to do huge pulls. you sure bet i got on my soapbox and yelled at him about how inconsiderate he was to other players)

i realize that sounds incredibly american of me, but i also did try my best to be there with google translate when it was clear i was in a group where nobody spoke english (despite me queueing as english-speaking-only-please, but S-E's matchmaking is sometimes... difficult) and i needed to communicate something like mechanics beyond the means of autotranslate, i would absolutely chuck it through autotranslate while also apologising that i had to use google for it lol

also i don't mean to sound prejudiced but also. i kind of do not miss being on an EU server because of the french players.

i know that 99.9% of them are lovely people, and that i never even knew they were french at all because, well, they learned how to say 'hi' in english or used autotranslate or so on. but holy shit some of the worst trolls came from that font of "i will speak only french, i will not use autotranslate, and neither will i do mechanics or in any way know i'm in a social game"

it's been a good bunch of names spotted in the wild in #ffxiv today

(but also WAIT MR. BIGTONK YOU'RE A WHITE MAGE)