Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

i have a Type and it's Anime Dads.....................................

*ace is not a dad but he is still a silver fox so he counts

i should probably actually play the other Zero Escape games, or at least replay 999

but then i'd have to confront the fact that i'm still hornty for Ace

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ baby rat.....

ok i should drag my silly ass to bed, please have this youtube classic to flight thee to thy rest, fediverse https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8coX8VkUKY8

(warning for flashing because well it's a youtube poop)

these were not the frogs i was looking for but Holy Shit check out these round boys

i realize now looking at the tag i've already posted that here but by god, i stand by my choices

*gets on soapbox*
*bangs pots and pans*

YOU CANNOT UNDERSTAND ANAKIN SKYWALKER/DARTH VADER UNLESS LOOKING AT HIM AS A CHILD SLAVE TURNED CHILD SOLDIER SET UP FOR FAILURE BY HIS ENVIRONMENT IN MULTIPLE WAYS SHOWING THE INHERENT DISADVANTAGES THAT REMAIN IN SUCH CLASS SYSTEMS

anyway i have a lot of #darthvader feelings and i'm going to put them in the goddamn tag because the tragic humanity of the character is an essential part that gets lost

for further reading/listening, please see this ancient fanmix i made yonks ago https://8tracks.com/harpalyce/that-slave-boy-all-grown-1 , "a lightly southern-gothic-flavoured mix for everyone's favourite country slave turned sith", because that description and cover art tells you like 90% of what my strong darth vader characterization feelings are about.

i think the tldr here is that i am gnashing my teeth rolling around howling because one of the suckiest parts of being disabled/etc. that nobody warns you about is the creative constipation. i have all these good thoughts roiling around in my head like excited eels but i can't make the words do well enough to pull them out and it is fuckin ASSBALLS my dudes

....just don't examine that last bit too hard and realize just how much of my fanfic is "bad person struggling to be better", at least not before you look at Run Rabbit Run!Snape and how he is going to be stuck for the near-entirety of the fic like a mosquito in amber in the gap between "it would be bad to say this and do this but i've just done it anyway. shit. fuck"

at least until he meets God who is the barmaid in the afterlife

it's

one of those fics?

and that's it, that's the difference

the vader i write is one who is remembering that he is a slave boy all grown, and these masters have kept him on a leash for far too long, and all those promises of those who live in luxury have never gone far

he is not good at remembering and he often stumbles. the tune sways and stops and starts but it keeps going nonetheless

sometimes the gap of a bad man trying to be better and struggling makes the most interesting writing

it's not a march. it doesn't have military time. you can't set an army to it. it's wheezing and wandering, strings stretching and groaning, now; it's a song that bends and nearly breaks under its own weight while bringing you into it. this is not a theme that bashes down your door. it knocks politely and asks if you are home in a whisper. it is not polished steel and gleaming mirror shines, it is grit and dust and grime

tbh i feel as if it gets the concept, some grain at the core, across quickly

Darth Vader has the imperial march. he has a Theme with Pomp and Circumstance and a full orchestra playing it.

so what makes my Vader different?

he gets his orchestra taken away

this is his song now https://soundcloud.com/annbjorg-lien/masques

humble fiddles echoing up into empty space

there ain't no room for a lordling now, down here where all the peasants are kept. he still doesn't know his place, though.

he still looks up.

i did just get called out by a passing observation of how fanfic titles go

however i will say that Masquerade aka the one that is my Precious Baby with Too Much Darth Vader In It is taken from a song directly

but since the song is instrumental i feel as if i'm being sneaky

i should probably go to bed before i start rambling about my own fanfic but it may be too late for that

sometimes i feel bad about making my viera alt be a ~famous murderess~ who actually gained some notoriety in garlean territory

but rp is all about making room on the dance floor for others

a person at her prime ready to kill does not have much room. but a washed-up person who used to be fierce but is now just falling apart, who might have been built up to be folk hero but is just here and exhausted and bleeding and threadbare? THAT'S much more tasty shit

the duality of defining characters

above is the link to several pages of flowery words in enigmatic style that are designed to make the reader feel emotions

and below is a description of the same character that i did in mspaint and entitled "davalia.gif"

repost but i'm still quite proud of this even though i've gotten now to the point where my obvious errors are running up and smacking me in the face but i'm too spoonless to go edit

anyway

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19402957/chapters/47757970

Harp's Bullshit reaches the Stabby Angry Bunny Alt

#spoonielife moods include SOMETHING JUST POPPED LOUDLY AND I'M GONNA NEED A MINUTE TO TELL YOU IF THAT WAS A GOOD OR BAD POP