printer error. please replenish nut tray
printer: 'PLEASE REPLENISH NUT TRAY'
*i back away from the printer. im kinda freaked out but i bring it the nuts that it wants. i have no idea what kinda. i give it cashew nuts since i dont really like those. im tryna find the nut tray. i think ive found it. i pour the nuts in. clatter clatter*
*the printers LCD screen goes blank*
me: fuckin fuckkin hell what the fuck is going to happen now
printer: ...
*its making some whirring sound ???*
printer: 'NUT'
@jk sign somewhere by the boss's door that says "You don't have to be nuts to work here!" ... then in very small print underneath "actually we'd prefer you weren't we don't want to have to keep explaining why the printer sometimes eats people"
@jk followed by a postit note taped, stapled AND GLUED to it in ALL CAPS, but written really small "actually just, don't bring any nuts whatsoever into the building it's really just safer... RIP Bob."