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I seriously need to find some ambient music or something to relax to.
Lately I've been using twitch streams or youtube streams as background noise so I can sleep, but I should be engaging with said streams.
I honestly don't know how to fix my stupid brain to do the "social interaction" thing right. 
I think one of the toughest things for me is engaging in a conversation.
I tend to look at internet personalities such as streamers from a long distance.
In my brain for some reason I don't think to talk/message these people ever. Just watch, don't interact.