Musings on my social life and skills, violence ment
I don't make friends. I end up with them. Seriously, I have no real idea how to actually make a friend. I kinda just ended up with all my friends. I mean, hell, my best friend for the longest time? Back in third grade, when he first moved to my school, I did something to him out of spite that could have killed him. By 5th grade, we were friends, and by 9th grade, we were best friends. With someone I could have killed (sorta) on purpose.
Musings on my social life and skills
One of my current close friends? She was the one who started talking to me the first semester I was at UTA. By the next semester, we were sitting outside the ERB talking late at night. My current best friend? Her boyfriend and president of a club she attended. That's where I met him (after an invitation from her) and, well, 3 months later, he was moving in with me.
Musings on my social life and skills
You may remember a few months ago when I posted a picture of me in a halloween costume. I was going out with some folx that night, specifically, folx I met in PHP. The second day I was there, I talked in the lobby with a guy who had to leave early the first day. Later, in the PHP room, he was talking with someone I'd met the previous day. Next thing I know, I hear my name. Shortly after, I get summoned to join them. The next week, we went to a club together.
Musings on my social life and skills
I don't make friends. I end up with them. This is the story of my life.
Musings on my social life and skills
Incidentally, of those folx from PHP, one of them I actually wanted to talk to, but was too intimidated. She was the kinda girl with dyed hair that I see and think "I bet she'd be cool to hang out with" but am too scared to actually talk to. That's girls with dyed hair for me: probably cool, but scary. You pretty much have to talk to me. (IRL, that is. On here, well...if you want *actual* talking, it's the same story.)
Musings on my social life and skills and being pre-everything trans and mental health (-)
But, yeah, kind of a fear that, like, my attempt to make a friend would come off as me just wanting in their pants. So, add that to my mental issues, I guess. Anxiety over that as well. Woo.
End of musings
In conclusion, none of this is particularly important for any of you, I wouldn't suppose, and I still don't understand friends. El fin (¿fín?).
Musings on my social life and skills and being pre-everything trans
Part of my fear in talking to these people, incidentally, is the fact I still come off as male and I'm worried my presence probably won't be wanted. I mean, I'd still probably worry about the latter if I woke up in a female form tomorrow, but the fact I come off as male just makes it that much worse for my brain. That and, well, most people don't tend to like strangers coming up outta nowhere and talking to them, do they?