@quephird@mastodon.social to be honest, it starts with "first step is going to be climbing down off that cross you've put yourself on there." second step is "after taking off the martyrdom blinders, realize that you are thinking of relationships as doomed hierarchies because you are making them so. if you believe winning these hierarchies is the only way to have friends, people are not going to be interested in being your friend because you believe friendship is winning and not, well, friendship."