i realize this game will be totally fucking nonsensical and shitty towards its female characters and the majority of it is a glorified walking sim BUT: we're watching an LP of it and all my Kojima-fan braincells lit back the fuck up. it's future cyber-military-chthonic horror drivel strung together by a long walk through the mountains and i'm just completely here for it. i'm sorry y'all

DO YOU KNOW WHY FRAGILE IS NAMED "FRAGILE"? It's because she was soaked from the neck down during a TIMEFALL, leaving only her perfect supermodel face intact. WHAT'S A "TIMEFALL"? It fucking rains time now. Whatever the rain hits, time speeds up. HOW DO PEOPLE PROTECT THEMSELVES FROM THIS? Wearing plastic raingear and eating big roach-sized tardigrades called "CRYPTOZOMES", which is why Fragile says "A cryptozome a day keeps the timefall away!" before eating a big fucking grub

when you start up the game it asks for your birthday, because "sufferers' DOOMS abilities can be impacted by the constellation they were born under". it's pure fucking batshit Hideo action and i'm sorry, there's literally no way I could stop myself from loving this so far

WHAT THE FUCK DOES "DOOMS" STAND FOR??????

DID I MENTION THAT THIS GAME IS SPONSORED BY MONSTER ENERGY????? IN THE FUTURE, THERE'S MONSTER ENERGY

i should specify, not as in "energy derived from monsters", I mean "cans of Monster brand caffeinated energy beverage, with the big goofy green neon M on them and everything"