So I saw the Sonic movie yesterday, and it was bad
I don't watch much of these "fish out of water cgi animal buddy movies" and I think I'll continue not to if this is the norm. Sonic wasn't even the main character.
ideas if I had to write a Sonic movie where the mandate is it's live action.
Change cop main character to park ranger. Remove all the copoganda.
The central conflict could be about the government or a horrible business encroaching upon protected wilderness. Protecting the world against rampant industrialization and habitat destruction is pretty Sonic-core, especially for the earlier games.
Make Sonic competent. The appeal of Sonic as a children's power fantasy is he knows what he's doing
@Farlow wait the main character is a fuckin' cop?? jeez. fuck that noise. Sonic would never work with cops. ROBOTNIK would. I mean the fucker LITERALLY HAS "SWAT Bots" in the SatAM show. Sonic though? Fuck that noise, he'd spraypaint ACAB on each cop's face in bright yellow car paint before they could blink. ESPECIALLY before they could blink.
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Nine
Yep, the human lead who feels like the main character is a cop. He's presented as being a wholesome and integral part to his small town, and his main motivation in the film is to work for the San Francisco police department to see "real" action.
The film ends with this moral that you should appreciate what you have and not leave your home even if you feel it's stifling your growth.
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Farlow oh... my god. every single part of that message is awful and totally against anything that IS Sonic the Hedgehog and holy fuuuuuuuuccckkk im gonna barf.
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Nine
That moral is weirded up by the cop angle, but if he were any other profession, it would be a pretty messed up moral regardless. Applying it to a doctor, for example, the movie would be like "Hi, I think I could put my talents to better use in an area I think needs it"
Sonic: WHAT, you should like what you have! (yes he does this in the film)
Human lead after the whole movie: Okay, sure
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Farlow hurgh. gross as fuck. D: fuck that film, yikes. Thanks absolutely for the warning! <3
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Farlow that clearly indicates that someone in corporate or an executive was like "okay so what's this Sonic thing we're doing?" and someone shows them City Escape from Sonic Adventure and they went "okay let's do that in the film"
"...what?"
"yeah just throw that in there it'll be great kids will love it oh but we don't want people to think like, sonic's the badguy, let's make his best friend a cop! A WHITE cop! Yeah! Perfect, ship it."
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Nine
the other angle in this chase scene is that for the second time in the movie, it takes place in effectively stopped time. The only ones moving are sonic and robotnik in his aircraft, so it lacks the thrill of all the chaos of a section like City Escape. So it's only two things moving and explosions on streets that are still populated with cars but lack any visible people.
so i don't spoil people who do want to watch this movie
@Nine
oh yeah no prob; this was a corporate mess with blatant advertising and a lot of wasted time. There are a ton of logical inconsistencies that I'd hand-wave if the whole affair were an animated feature, but they had make it live action.
There's this destructive San Francisco chase scene in daylight, a lot of action going on. There is nobody on the street or in their cars, and sonic never thinks "i should take this chaos elsewhere"