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god gave me adhd and depression when he created me because otherwise he knew i would be powerful enough to topple his throne
Aura V. boosted

A saw a shirt depicting a married couple with the bride happy, the husband sad, and the words "life sentence" above them.

I know it's been asked before, but /are/ the straights okay?

Bad habits I need to break 

If I do this to you, I'm really sorry. I'm trying not to act flippant about stuff, I really am.

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Bad habits I need to break 

Saying "obviously" when I'm trying to explain something to someone who doesn't know about it. Like, gods fucking damn, brain! You're explaining it to them *precisely because it's not obvious*! Stop saying "obviously"!

Aura V. boosted

œstrogen that makes you develop keratinous protrusions on your head

or "horn e", for short

Things my RA has done tonight 

- Scare me with an unexpected knock at the door
- Remind me how bad a limp handshake feels
- Give me oreos (but, like, the thin ones)
Overall: Net neutral, leaning negative

9/11 

I know I'm a day late, but never forget that *18* years later, security still hasn't gone back to normal:

youtube.com/watch?v=yyzd_a6vLW

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We *need* more stories where friendship is portrayed as important and equal, ones *without* making it a competition between friendship and romance where one has to win.

It's sad that TNG is the only example I can think of.

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Bird Site; Might Be NSFW 

RT @blackdubliner@twitter.com

yall are deadass like “we live in a fascist nation” and “the government is running concentration camps” and two seconds later you’re like “we should ban guns ☝🏽”

Aura V. boosted
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lewd? 

How can you call yourself a real gamer if you won't suck your girlfriend's dick?

Aura V. boosted
Aura V. boosted

Honestly, if you want a surefire way to get me to fav and boost your toot, just quote Eggman's monologue from the Sonic Adventure 2 Dark Story Real-time Fandub

lewd adj 

*Dumps water on self*
"I am so wet right now, babe."

Aura V. boosted

What Would Jesus Do?

🔹Inspire friends to anarchy
🔹Help sex workers
🔹Fight social injustice
🔹Kick bankers out of the market
🔹Refuse to honour corrupt government

Be Like Jesus.

That thing that's apparently relevant today 

I saw a sign on the way to the store today that said "Never forget". What am I not supposed to be forgetting? I forgot already.

lewd, no context 

"My root beer jizzed on me!"

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Computer Fairies

Computer Fairies is a Mastodon instance that aims to be as queer, friendly and furry as possible. We welcome all kinds of computer fairies!