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vent 

I hate when I come up with a term I like and then I google it and find out it has a bunch of associated baggage I don't want.

plurality, mental health (~) 

Individual sysmates having their own mental health problems would've been impossible to understand before knowing we were a system. What do you even do with "I have these issues but only for a period of less than a day every couple of months or so"?

But hey, now that we know, we can help each other through this stuff.

Heard the story of the girl throwing starfish into the ocean? A man watching her says "don't you know there are miles of beach and you can't make a difference?"

The girl bends down and scoops up another starfish and gently throws it into the ocean, turns to the man and says "it made a difference to that one".

I often think of this story when world events make me feel powerless. I can't help everyone, but I can help *someone*.

So... if anyone needs me to throw them into the sea, I'm here.

asking for music recs! // 

@lioness wall of sound + no English lyrics kinda rules out the vast majority of music I listen to. SEXY-SYNTHESIZER might fit, but by virtue of being Japanese there's occasionally English mixed in, and also silence is occasionally used to change things up. But just in case it is what you're looking for: sexy-synthesizer.bandcamp.com/

Me: Someone should really document this, it'd be a lot easier to work with.
Other me: Dammit.

@hollie I approached this by adding every account I want to keep up with to a list. My "Home" feed is for when I want to dip into the higher-traffic accounts.

because in many people there is a terror about looking foolish, about making mistakes, about being visibly wrong, about being the idiot, about not knowing.

It feels vulnerable to many people to stand there and not understand a situation, or worse for people to see you dont understand. And fearing that can make you as fragile as glass because its inevitable, we all make mistakes all the time, and we all barely know anything compared to what is knowable out there. But worse still the mechanisms people lean on to hide ever admitting to making mistakes creates deep holes that can really cut you off from enjoying life.

in clown training there are two types of people when they make a mistake in front of people - those who can laugh at themselves and invite others to enjoy their misfortunate, and those who get embarrassed/angry/try to hide it.

Those people who can laugh at themselves, the skill they have is self-empathy in being a fallible human. They are comfortable knowing they are not perfect, they can find humour in messing up - which is a superpower. Messing up rolls off their back and people love them for it because it means they openly admit when they're wrong and dont see it as a problem, which means they apologise, they learn, they keep themselves open and they put their heart out there to find friendship, to find trust, to find love. They dont live in ivory towers. They can be silly, they can play, they can be foolish and enjoy things simply as they are.

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back in the mid 00s the idea of "geek chic" became a thing, collectively people began to understand its ok to be nerdy about stuff you love, its ok to love the things you love and its ok for those things to not be mainstream, and its ok for them to be complicated or obscure. It was an overcoming of the 80s trope that nerds are the defacto losers of the story. Finally to be a nerd was loveable, it was to be true to who you were and to be proud of it - we all could recognise and accept the nerdy parts to ourselves.

The trouble is that the opposite of the nerd is the jock, ie the himbo, the bimbo. And we now are at the precipice of the worm turning where we collectively have to break down that preconception of stereotype at the other end of the axis, and nerds have to settle their grudges and recognise that intelligence and the cul-de-sac that is irony are not the be all and end all to existence - that there are other skillsets out there that are of equal value, that intelligence is not wisdom, that understanding does not equal empathy.

Yes we do have to go through the current counter revolution to find true balance of both nerd and bimbo in all of us.

streaming 

twitch.tv/madewokherd Still learning to play this game with my feet, but first some testing.

artisans.coop/

oh pog artisans coop just launched. i hope its successful, #etsy has had it too good for too long.

what helps people get comfortable on the command line? jvns.ca/blog/2023/08/08/what-h

Would love more stories of things that helped you in the last ~5 years!

(as usual, no need to reply if you don’t remember, or if you’ve been using the command line comfortably for 15 years — this question isn’t for you :) )

trauma, gaslighting 

@hollie @EMFaulds I seem to have somehow grown up with unusually high resistance to gaslighting. I didn't believe it was possible for me to "be wrong" about my own experience, even if I didn't know why it apparently differed from others.

I wasn't able to articulate that, and it was frustrating to anyone having to deal with me, but I think it protected me from the worst harms of not having my neurodivergence accommodated or even understood.

ph- 

Shoulder started hurting last night for no apparent reason (this is the opposite shoulder from the one I hurt last year), seems to be improving so I guess I'll just try to go about my routine.

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Computer Fairies

Computer Fairies is a Mastodon instance that aims to be as queer, friendly and furry as possible. We welcome all kinds of computer fairies!