Am I a fool for constructing such a specific way of expressing what I am and what I want to be? Forever holding at arm's length the dream I describe, telling everyone "I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish"

I don't think it's foolish... but... is it helping? Am I better for understanding this about myself? Does it make my life better, to have cultivated such a clear picture of my heart's desire, to be able to point at it and say "this can never be, but I will die trying to accomplish it"

I think it does help. I think it does. It helps me and it seems to help others, based on how people react to what I make and do. Even if I never wind up living the things I aspire to in the way that I imagine.