🥭 @void@computerfairi.es

im still exhausted by it.

as usual it went fine. i talked about my life problems and then we chatted about wedding rings and cows, and yelled about bullshit doctors. she kept the advice to a minimum and just let me vent

@MUCK ahahaha...

@MUCK maybe? ill see how burn i am after therapy

i have so much respect for furries. im still trying to design w/w/h fursonas and like. how the fuck do y'all do this

and by talk i mean actual out loud communication. typing and text chat is fine

i want to talk to my WIFE and maybe some of my friends and no one else

probably not the healthiest way to handle therapy but I Don't Care

ugh it's fine i call and ill yell about my Problems and show off my scar and pretend to listen to her advice while sketching

there's basically nothing i can do about any of this, and there's only so many anti-anxiety brain hacks you can advise me on to help with that

or like, at least to wait out the immediate bad shit

i deeply wish this shit wasn't online right now, because genuinely it would be more helpful for my mental state to leave the house and sit quietly in her office and dick around with one of the fidget toys she has and chat about other bullshit than for her to try and give me advice about coping when everything is objectively terrible and the only way to fix it is for change on a national scale, if not a global one

i literally never want to and then i go and its usually fine but i would rather shrivel into a cube than try and force myself to talk today

ugh i have therapy today. i don't. wanna.

anyway. i think tonight ill start my yume nikki replay. i miss it very much

also ftr im still typing mostly one handed on my phone using the weird scribble on keyboard/predictive text combo so im consistently using the wrong words

maybe im just too judgy

OH ALSO CRY OF FEAR. it just wasn't well written or made and i don't know why it's so popular

i also felt that way about prototype, which i mostly bought because how weirdly popular the ac1 crossover trend was?

yndd has no such excuses and im still bitter. ill finish it eventually i guess but i was so. fucking. excited for it.