so i found the more permanent solution to my keyboard woes and it is -
get this, y'all. just admire the level of idiotic choices of jury-rigging i and many others have stooped to.
- to keep windows from reinstalling the internal keyboard drivers after you uninstall them so you can use an external keyboard with your laptop, you instead tell it to turn off all the safeties and choose a driver for the internal keyboard that absolutely does not work, fooling it into obsolescence