@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online (ok some of these gifs are horrid but https://gfycat.com/hotwarmasianpiedstarling and similar in that set looks like something you would enjoy on discord or similar 💖 )
(also you're probably 1500 steps ahead of me but the "i feel awful and idk why" problem is something https://youfeellikeshit.com/ can really effectively help untangle that particular plate of brain bad spaghetti)