instead of taking over ms holly glaceon's perfectly cromulent personal thread even more than i already have,

i gotta admit the point that makes me go breathe into a brown paper bag at feeling a new dx drooling over my shoulder is when i go "haha no see, i'm good with social cues and such, i can't be on the autism spectrum" and then the internet just roars WELL YOU COULDA MADE IT A SPECIAL INTEREST. REMEMBER HOW MUCH TIME YOU SPENT READING MISS MANNERS BOOKS and i start sweating bullets

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i don't mean to imply that getting a new diagnosis is a bad thing, or that having a diagnosis is a bad thing, by the way

i have a bit of a tangled ball of personal feelings alongside knowing with head-smarts that dx'ing is good, it is valuable information, it means solidarity and solutions

but uhhhh my dudes, heart-dumb means that this meme is Very True

@wigglytuffitout honestly my reason for not getting an autism diagnosis is like

what would it get me

nothing

i'm out of the employment circus anyway, disability wouldn't help me, all it'd really do is open me up to medical discrimination

@InspectorCaracal honestly, valid

idk, maybe i could add it to my litany of different things on my "please give me disability" list, but i feel like it'd be such a pain in the ass to actually get that it wouldn't be terribly worth it

same with the dyscalculia, it's a heaping portion of WHELP THIS WOULDA BEEN COOL TO KNOW IN 4TH FUCKIN GRADE

@wigglytuffitout personally i'm just like, knowing there is An Explanation For This Shit is nice, I don't care if I have some sort of official authoritative piece of paper saying "yeah you're autistic"

then again I have an extremely low opinion of most other people's judgement

also I have a low-level anxiety that they will tell me I'm not autistic and then nothing will make sense again

ha ha

@InspectorCaracal ok that is kind of a valid anxiety though since so much of the american healthcare bullshit hellscape is constructed in a way where just one doctor going "i don't believe you, i think you're faking. gtfo" is like a cannonball to a palace made of playing cards

I AM PROBABLY NOT HELPING THAT ANXIETY ANY but, well, as the kids say. big hat. same mood.

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