Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

i'm really tired of the discussion about it going totally the other way

"but it's in all of these other foods -" yeah bub, a lot of those foods are also common migraine triggers!

"but your body makes it naturally -" my dude, my body also makes hormones that cause migraines in me. that is no guarantee.

it is also true that sometimes somebody can get away with eating a little MSG and not reach that having-a-migraine level. still doesn't mean they're faking.

ok y'all

listen. i get that MSG has gotten a really bad rap. i know and understand some of that is pure racism, particularly against chinese immigrants, using bunk claims to 'other' this group and vilify them. i know that some people absolutely do make up what MSG can do and are totally lying about it.

however.

IT REALLY IS A MIGRAINE TRIGGER, AND A FAIRLY COMMON ONE AT THAT

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online i could actually see that working perfectly to be honest. apparently gator meat is quite tasty and mild and takes seasoning quite well

where we get into stretches are concepts like some sort of gumbo-inspired roll - okra tempura, andouille sausage, shrimp/lump crab meat, served with a brick roux based sauce...?

who needs a heating pad for cramps when you have a dog?

(dog i love you but this is slightly inconvenient. #hollypls )

y cramps tho

Who Will Rid Me Of This Troublesome Uterus

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online

AND WITH THEIR POWERS COMBINED

THEY MADE

MASTODON!!!!!!!!

FUCK!!! IVE FOUDN THE SECRET LORE!!!!!! IT ALL MAKES SENSE

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online there's the new hot story idea

person is cursed so that everything they touch turns to titties

they meet their soulmate

who is cursed so that everything they touch turns to teeth

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online OH SHIT CWS I FORGOT FUCK

ok but milk instead of saliva would be kind of awful as well. it's like midas touch but instead now everything tastes also of milk.

burrito... with milk. spaghetti... with milk. salt and vinegar potato chips... with milk. sardines... with milk.

you take a shot of vodka and the milk just curdles

ALAS

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online "come on over babe and lemme titty-gum you"

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online and then ur gf cries because she wants to eat crunchy things but instead of chompers she just has tiny squishy titties

but on the plus side, new and interesting endeavors in giving head,

(i am not actually that sorry) (but i am still somewhat sorry yes.)

i am. So sorry for that last post

@Sapphicgiraffic@snouts.online obviously, to make sure this never happens, we must sacrificially enter into discourse combining both these topics.

so, please consider:

1. suckin on ya gf's titty and the titty bites u back

2. ya gf smile at u and all her teef is tiny titties now

anyway here is this rather lovely article

https://www.bbc.com/news/disability-47064773?fbclid=IwAR1ZovG79E1SY6k0DWQnD7cuFfBSEDJZXtuieRFlfP22JH85Mi7HqWsbTx4

if you play #WoW or #ffxiv or do roleplay in any sort of mmorpg, i would highly recommend this read

it's one of the rare articles from major news media that not only treats roleplay in mmorpgs respectfully, but as a positive thing, highlighting the lasting friendships that can result from them - and how important these can be to disabled folks.

bring tissues tho. you will cry.

@gazimoff SHHHH WE MUST KEEP MY SALT SECRET

yeah it's not exactly the most well hidden secret here lmfao but i figure yelling "suck my diiiiiiiick" over here is preferable to giving the mods more work 😂

oh and then an actual admin came along to say "i think this was a very good and appropriate post here thank you for making it" more or less so

SUCK MY DIIIIIIIIIIIICK, ASSBUCKET

me: posts touching story on ffxiv rper discord about a disabled WoW rper making lasting connections through roleplay and being fondly remembered after his death, as reported in the BBC (it's a fucking good article, i cried buckets)

comment: "this is nice and all but it should have been posted in general chat."

note: not from a mod. from a regular mook. and a regular mook who is new.

so, away from that polite sphere can i just say

OH GO CHOKE ON A CHODE YOU MISERABLY GRUMPYGUTS

and akates?

well.

he remains, as he always has been,

a steadfast vegan.

but feel free to take a cupcake while he finishes reviewing vendor agreements for this outpost's supply of dry goods for the mess hall.

the tale spreads.

everybody looks at the tiny little sith inquisitor and comes to the conclusion that behind the cupcakes and the books is actually someone not to be fucked with lightly. far better to go after somebody who straightforwardly tells you what you're up against, than somebody who has shown he's willing to fight dirty.

unpredictable prey is bad prey. so everyone moves on from eyeing akates's throat.