Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

i may have just chased a scary bug across my parlor room spraying it with windex

in my defense, a) big, b) looks scary, c) kinda worried it's an ant battle queen or some sort of carpenter ant queen and NO ROOM FOR ANTS IN HERE GO AWAY

FUCK YO PEDOSTACHE, ALL BJORK IS BEST. DO NOT SEEK TO RANK THEM.

or if vespertine isn't number one i am fucking coming for you and your bad facial hair both

Look At Him, Look At My Favourite Garbage Murderdad

Behold This Utter Terrifying Trash Fire (i chant as i post more au darth vader)

i'm actually mildly terrified that the next commission i get of vader from my au fanfic, some sort of DILF singularity will occur, and i will be crushed by an oncoming wave of people way too hornt for him due to artists just being way too good at delivering that vibe

source: see following comms by minttu, takens, and hoiist

cws for eye contact and a bit of blood

sorry everyone it's real darth vader hours

i feel like in the interests of expediency for communicating the essential aspect of his character, the next commission i get of my pet-fanfic-version darth vader/anakin skywalker should just be like

him painted over this

if you've never seen the episode of the muppet show where mark hamill guest stars PLEASE do so, it is a joy and a gift

my favourite is that mark hamill plays himself being really excited to be there but gets CONSTANTLY PUSHED OUT OF THE LIMELIGHT BY HIS JERK COUSIN LUKE SKYWALKER

please, i beg you, someone out there who has #yakuza and some 3d posing software and/or time for fanart. PLEASE recreate this trend but it's haruka quietly dying of embarrassment as kiryu yeets himself skyward in full ministry of silly walks pose https://imgur.com/gallery/9zMjljf

@maple (e.g. when i know i'm in a space where there's a lot of kids - like, say, in the splatoon2 tag on twitter - i have to keep in mind, quite seriously, what i'm saying and doing as to be a good influence, publicly and visibly. i feel like way too many people laugh that off or "oh whatever they'll be fine" when it's very important.)

@maple honestly, agreed

i'm glad my parents did most of their monitoring of me by being involved in my life, interested in my activities, etc. and i think this is really the best way to do it - fostering a good relationship with your kids to the point where you know what they're doing, because they want to tell you

but i know on furcadia for instance i certainly had a lot of "there but for the grace of god go i" moments, and i try hard to pay that forward when i can

i mean i make that joke but i also know enough about myself that although i wouldn't hold a puppy gender reveal party, mostly because i intend to adopt where there's not much fanfare about that part,

i totally would throw a puppy shower aka baby shower equivalent aka "everyone come over and look at my cute dog" party

i know it's a stolen joke but it's also so true and i think of it often:

they say there's not really such a thing as white culture, but i would beg to disagree

'cos we don't have anybody but ourselves to blame for puppy gender reveal parties.

mfw slate.com's article about 'new affordable eye cream that really works' is 55 fucking dollars

phew lordy that was an easy block of a new person rolling in to follow me

i guess at least they make it easy by only retooting how they're mad about how it's a shame there are now petite weeb girls to flirt with

fuck me, my ear and throat are now REALLY screaming

don't know quite which is which, sweet oil didn't help the ear, so next up is some numbing throat spray. ugh