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@monorail worst analogy you say

on my honor as a purveyor of really bad analogies, i can do worse. so much worse. i don't have examples handy but just you wait (and possibly ask me about how neurons are like japanese deer-scares)

๐Ÿฅ€๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒท๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒฑ
โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿฅ€๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ€๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒฑ
๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€โฌ›๐Ÿฅ€โฌ›๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒตโฌ›๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ€
๐ŸŒผโฌ›โฌ›๐ŸŒปโฌ›๐Ÿฅ€โฌ›๐ŸŒตโฌ›๐Ÿ€
โฌ›๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒต๐ŸŒต๐ŸŒฑโฌ›๐ŸŒป
๐ŸŒผโฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐ŸŒนโฌ›โฌ›๐ŸŒป
๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒผโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ€๐Ÿฅ€๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒฑโฌ›
๐ŸŒปโฌ›โฌ›๐ŸŒนโฌ›๐ŸŒนโฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐ŸŒท
๐ŸŒปโฌ›๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒนโฌ›๐ŸŒฑโฌ›๐ŸŒท๐Ÿฅ€
๐ŸŒปโฌ›๐Ÿž๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒฑ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒผโฌ›๐ŸŒผ

when a furry sneezes the sound it makes is achuwu send toot

i wonder what conditioner does bayonetta use tho

note: not my screenshots here, pulled from google, without specific credit as to preserve the dignity of those who brought the screenshots to us

yes it really looks that rough it's an mmorpg for the switch what did you expect

the combat is actually pretty ok but i'm not kidding about weeaboo jenkem

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so i have been playing this free to play mmorpg on the switch mostly out of morbid curiosity and by that i mean i'm softly going 'oh my god' at the sheer weeaboo levels

"harp it's a game made in japan how can it be weeb"

please see attached screenshot evidence.

this is advanced weebshit. this is weeb *jenkem*, my friends.

cw for some sort of fetish pileup who has a gun for a sword (i wish i was kidding), and a drunk catgirl so minimally clothed i am astounded

(arriving to a joke several years late:)

Dr. von Doom Decides To Shitpost On Mastodon (Colorized), 1957

๐“ฒ ๐“ญ๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ท'๐“ฝ ๐“ฌ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“ธ๐“ผ๐“ฎ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ฒ๐“ถ๐“ฎ ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฏ๐“ฎ.

๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ฒ๐“ถ๐“ฎ ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฏ๐“ฎ ๐“ฌ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“ผ๐“ฎ ๐“ถ๐“ฎ

(hime lolita voice) ๐“…๐“Š๐“‰ ๐’ถ ๐’ธ๐“‡๐‘œ๐“Œ๐“ƒ ๐‘œ๐“ƒ ๐’พ๐“‰.

๐ผ ๐’ฎ๐’œ๐ผ๐’Ÿ ๐’ซ๐’ฐ๐’ฏ ๐’œ ๐น๐’ฐ๐’ž๐’ฆ๐ผ๐’ฉ๐’ข ๐’ž๐‘…๐’ช๐’ฒ๐’ฉ ๐’ช๐’ฉ ๐ผ๐’ฏ

@hal@slime.global fashion is just doing this but very confidently

i firmly believe that roald dahl was on to something when he wrote that no matter the shape of your face, if you are a good person, the goodness will pour out of you and you will be lovely

and honestly the two greatest examples of this are counter-examples.

what i'm saying, basically, is that every time i see jeffree star and anne coulter i am absolutely sure that they would be most at home climbing the ceiling at 4am to come eat my dog while ghoulishly screeching

Imagine copyright law making all the Important works lost so that all historians will know of our era is weird shitpost games from itch.io and fanfictions no one bothered to DRM

Actually there is 1000% going to be a famous property we love today that will only survive in references in fanfiction, this is basically a historical certainty (it's more or less what happened to Sappho)

Let us all hold hands and hope it's Harry Potter

like i would if i could! but i'm not... sure... why we were informed of this as a need-a-mod-immediately!!!! type problem......

it's touching to be considered that powerful but also i can't actually remote into your computer and block people on fb for you

i mean i could

but idk if you want me to do that because if you admit you have a problem starting shit on fb, i'm just going to delete your fb to solve that issue

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like it's nice and all when someone assumes we mods are omnipotent but the reality is that being a mod of a discord server, and our power level on getting people banned from facebook, can be shown in the following graph

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ah, time for today's Moderating Moment

"these users are being mean to me for saying i called them transphobic when i was just happy to be in a trans-friendly space"

ok i don't see the channel this is happening in, but tell me who it is and we'll deal with it

"oh it's in pms, here's what was written"

...ok this is not anyone on our server

"no it's on facebook"

ah...

"i started shit with them and now i'm scared :( do something about this mods pls"

...well, i have some bad news

ngl makeup application is probably the one thing that makes me grit my teeth and consider contact lenses/lasik or whatever

then i remember that my eyeballs don't like contact lenses (the inside of my eyelids start building up protein and it feels gritty and awful), and lasik might not even work/is expensive

but still

would be nice to be able to see more than like 8 inches from my face so i could BLEND MY FUCKING EYESHADOW

or if i could figure out how to put on falsies. that would also be good.

magnetic false eyelashes greatly appeal to me as a concept i just can't... maneuver the little motherfuckers

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apparently blue eyeshadow is back on trend and people are groaning because it's easy to look 1980's tacky

however

i'm very pleased with this turn of events because if i put blue right next to my grey-blue eyes they actually look more blue than grey HOORAY

NOW IF ONLY MY EYELASHES WOULD GROW IN

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Computer Fairies

Computer Fairies is a Mastodon instance that aims to be as queer, friendly and furry as possible. We welcome all kinds of computer fairies!