Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

@DangerDyke i've not done it at home myself tbh but i may be able to offer knowledge of an alternative - it's likely you're way ahead of me ofc but have you looked into at-home laser treatments?

their main downside is that it only really works when there's a lot of contrast between skin and hair so it leaves a lot of people shit out of luck.

ofc you're probably way ahead of me, but in the 5% chance this is useful, i thought it worth mentioning?

*steps up to mic*

*clears throat*

Brownie Batter hummus is an abomination that should not exist, and I am terrified to exist in the same world as it. Thank you.

*steps down from stage to thunderous applause*

diantha's theme a) fucking slaps, b) is the ideal music that i should have playing as i make my entrance to basically fucking anywhere while in rococo/hime lolita coordinates. BRING ON THE BATTLE CHIMES OF WAR AND THE DELICATE RIFFS OF A MUSIC BOX. WEEP BEFORE MY GLITTER AND DESPAIR, YE MORTALS

@Irina@fedi.lynnesbian.space i will accept a hoenn remake into my heart If I Can Create Cute Outfits. this is a reasonable goal i feel

but also the sheer unmitigated glamour of kalos's champion must i think also be talked about

"harp do you just like diantha because she's unmitigatedly high femme and also one of the legendaries is a pretty deer" PERHAPS, BUT I AM ALSO NOT WRONG https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpgQa-TOk0M

@Irina@fedi.lynnesbian.space I STAND BY IT NONETHELESS

could you create cute outfits in hoenn? NO

could you create cute outfits in kalos? YES

Q E D

but also kalos > hoenn don't fucking at me you know i'm right

Harp's Video Game Wishlist Of Varying Implausibility, continued, yet again:

7. remasters of x/y and sun/moon on switch because fuck y'all they're good ok

8. the biggest yet most impossible desire: that the team developing The Secret World/Secret World Legends be given adequate funding and unburdened by the yoke of Funcom Monetization Bullshit, making the game less of a bastard grind and them free to continue to create meaningful things instead of lootbox foibles

Video Games Wishlist Of Varying Implausibility Continued:

5. straight-up mobile ports or adaptations of Catz/Dogz 4 or 5, no microtransaction bullshit, just The Game, perhaps with some mobile social features like putting out an "ambassador dog" people can play with, being able to send petz easily to others, etc.

6. also the Creatures series to make a comeback, in its hard biology sim roots. If I Can't Tinker On An Individual Gene Level I Don't Want It Motherfuckers

and now apropos of nothing, here's Harp's Video Game Wishlist Of Varying Implausibility

1. switch port for Bastion

2. switch port for Recettear

3. hd rerelease/remaster of KOTOR 1, with KOTOR 2 but like, unfucked and unmangled into a whole game. throw 'em on the switch too, fuck it

4. while i'm at it, hd remaster of Fallout New Vegas and you know where this is going: switch release for it

(i will take my chances going into gammorah while on the airplane ok)

@InspectorCaracal well that WOULD explain why they're so comfortable to sit on, but not why they're in a basket or why he consumes 10 per kilometer as per in-game tooltip

@InspectorCaracal i think tanuki is probably in there somewhere as well but i do believe he traded his massive balls in for apples

good for you, Apple Loving Fuck

@InspectorCaracal it is extremely kawaii. i am sure there were board meetings detailing the Apple Loving Fuck's kawaii level. somebody designed it for maximum cuteness, in committee.

i am both awed and terrified

the voice acting in this game continues to be hilariously bad, but at least i'm cute

and i get to ride on a uhhhhhhhhh......... whatever this is

on his apple backpack

i'm just calling him The Apple Loving Fuck

shoutout to my vyvanse for deciding to fuck off all day but only come around for the last 30 minutes it can hang around in my system

i mean i'm glad that it showed up enough for me to dump like 6 paragraphs of enthusiastic pro-mental-wellness-and-recovery at somebody but also WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS TRYING TO WRITE EARLIER

this mobile mmo has an auto mode which on one hand i am slightly conflicted about, because the game is fun for actually yknow playing?, but on the other

this could be exceedingly useful when i am Zero Spoons McGee sacked out in bed

it's tales of wind. i'm shading tales of wind by the way

the actual gameplay stuff is... working better than i thought a mobile mmorpg was gonna be but y'all it might be worth the download to just laugh your ass off at the real fucking bad voice acting

just select female rogue in character creation and know that it's 100% Susan From Accounts Payable Who They Suggested Do It 'Cos She Shopped At Hot Topic Once

so i may have downloaded a mobile mmorpg on a lark last night and oh my god y'all this has some of the most comedically bad voice acting i have ever heard

it's so clear that they were just like "we don't need VOICE ACTORS! we got voices! hey susan, get over here and say these lines. you got a kid at home, right? yeah bring him in tomorrow..."

me: oh boy creative brain is here time to write!!!

creative brain: well looks like i should be going

me: but i wrote 3 paragraphs and then figured out a good french name and now you're leaving??? what about the rest of the chapter?!??!!?

creative brain: lolbye

me: hmmm maybe i can must muscle on through....

my shoulder: well actually about this whole "typing at the computer thing" :)

me: ...

me: :(