Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz i'm not sure what admin options there are, but something like a temp ban - even if jury-rigged through something as meta as "i've changed your login, it'll be back to normal in 2 days. go cool off" - would be appropriate. an admin note of "knock it off. you acted badly. this is not acceptable behavior and if you keep this up, your ass is grass" would be appropriate, especially i think in public response, instead of the "just block him idk ugh".

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz i mean, he's keeping on keeping on as if he is perfectly in the right, so i think it's pretty clear that he does not care about how unkind he is, despite what you or other friends may think.

does that sound like somebody everyone should agree needs no more moderation than deleting one post?

i get that he's your friend. but people are also frustrated because, from what i'm hearing, "radical.town admins did bupkis" is a bit of a theme. hence, instance blocks.

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz and honestly, if the answer is "that's just him, block it if you don't like it, it's just how he is", i don't think it's unreasonable for people to get frustrated at an admin who expects you to just know about the missing stair instead of doing anything to fix the problem of the stair being missing. (no, i am not laying any accusations of assault here; the idea is merely a useful one - the idea that someone should be accommodated and managed but not removed).

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz i find it kind of the bare minimum honestly. and i know the catch-22 of moderating well - transparency versus kind consideration behind closed doors - but there are some issues where unfortunately a mod has to make a bit more of a public response, even if it's "i've dealt with it. let's move on, please." this plus the previously mentioned "well just block him" attitude, and the user in question offering no apology etc. as well - i hope you can see why some are upset.

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz it's also why "just block them" is such a weak answer, if you view it as identifying an individual for the audience to specifically target. sure, you can block one person. but you have to swat down all they're trying to send to you one by one.

it's why also people are dissatisfied with that "ugh, he's just an asshole, get over it and block him" from the mod as well. it's a space where acknowledgement of concerns is really needed.

@Jessicacrets@mastodon.xyz i mean, i think the issue here is the response of "well it's a dick move, but we won't do anything about it".

screenshot dunking is indeed not good, but for me at least, the inclusion of username - especially username that is not a tag, so no chance to offer rebuttal - is used mainly as a signal for "go harass this person specifically". that level of identification elevates it from a dick move into, well, something more.

@catpigg i mean.... i'm pretty fuckin evangelical about em no lie lol

i've never had an eshakti dress fall apart on me, either, despite having them in my wardrobe for around 10 years now. some i've donated because my fashion sense changed, and one i miss dearly but that's because its strap was hitting my aching shoulder in just the most awful spot so it had to tearfully go to another home

...i still miss it. ...it made my tits look fantastic.

i'm basically trying to start some sort of cult at this point where we recruit others to come wear pretty dresses, and i'm fine with it

...

alternatively, i just described #lolitafashion sooo,

@catpigg I KNOW RIGHT? i swear to god i gush over eshakti so much because having a made to measure dress that just... *fits*... was genuinely fucking lifechanging for me, and made me realize that fashion was something i could actually *participate in*, instead of just stare sadly at as other people did it.

also they have fucking huge pockets. like, my wallet AND my nintendo 3ds in one pocket and full skirt so nobody knew. plus bra strap holders and snaps for wrap necklines. THEY'RE GREAT

@catpigg one honorable mention to toss in there is modcloth. they're expensive, so like... clearance rack only basically lol. but they have a pretty ok plus range, and some dresses in knits. the UK-sized dresses are always frustrating, but their 4x US size is actually what i consider a true 4x (aka, what I wear), not too tight.

@catpigg and honestly even though 70 dollars for a dress is an Investment (tm), like... let's be real... we'd be spending the same fucking money at Macy's or whatever, combing through to find something that fits decently all afternoon, and then it'd probably fall apart on the second wash lol

made-to-measure is genuinely lifechanging - being able to have a dress that just... fits. just FITS. it just fits your body and That's It. no fuss. no fighting. it's... kinda miraculous.

@catpigg my bff ride-or-die though is eshakti. custom made to measure, HUGE FUCKING POCKETS, really cute dresses. and in that 10 dollar customize fee you also get to change length, collar type, sleeve type etc... one of my dresses from there is on, like, year 7 or 8 and is just going fucking strong. https://www.sweetdisabled.com/sweetdisabled/recs-eshakti is a whole long thing i wrote (pls ignore, like, the rest of the unfinished site lol).

they usually also run good coupons for new customers too (free custom, etc.)

@catpigg god i know that feeling for sure

in terms of fast fashion, i've actually had decent luck at rainbow. i'm just about living in a denim peasant dress from them this summer, along with the anime water dress from trashqueen lol

torrid is pretty good IF you can work sales. ditto with heruniverse, and they all kinda cross-pollenate with hot topic too. that's in the set of like... nerdy clothing and shit like that. but cute nerdy. like nerdy you can wear at the office lol

@catpigg *driveby hug*

if i had some good places to look, i'd let you know, but i at least have places of "worth it if you want to save up" in my head if you'd ever like that? you might also keep an eye out if trashqueen has a sale - they also have some super super cute stuff that's still in that price range but goes on sale from time to time (and is very well made)!

@smolshrew@piss.restaurant some kids play a bad video game that ends up destroying the universe multiple times with the assistance of some grey-skinned horned assholes. people cosplaying said assholes who don't properly seal their body paint become the bane of conventions forevermore.

that's about all i remember

"builder of the damned" sounds like a potentially cool title if you entirely ignore the context in which i created it just now

@maple conspiracy theory: the new cute version of the chucky doll from that horror franchise hunted down bob the builder and sucked the adorable from him in a dark pact. bob is now builder of the damned

@maple WHY DOES HE HAVE TEETH AND SUCH TINY LITTLE EYES OH GOD

honestly, why screenshot dunk when you can just subtoot and vague, like *civilized* people 🧐