i hope i can also manage to meet some people who aren't magnificently shitty today too lol

wtf do i do to kill time

i just have to sit here ugh

istg if he finds me i'm just gonna say i was trippin out because of all the people and just needed to be alone

might just go home tbh lmaoooo

i'm too broken to conquer fear

i don't believe in myself

what am i even afraid of

the least i can do is walk around and get the free shit right

i'm just stoned enough to not give a fuck fuck it let's go walk and see things

omg i ran into him lol

i said i was leaving

well shit now what

i started walking away to the exit lol

i'm high idgaf i'll head back in soon

wasted the first half of this event just hiding lmao

I'M HAVING THE BEST PRIDE EVER

omg so

first @mellifera dropped by and said hi

then i went and sat waiting for @PupperoniDogsnax

then this trans girl came up to me and was basically like "hi, i see you're here alone, i am too, and i was about to leave but i got tired of not knowing anyone so i decided to just come up to people and talk to them, you looked cool so i figured i'd talk to you"

we talked, i gave her my spare lesbian flag pin, we exchanged numbers and are gonna meet at the parade

she left, pupperoni arrived...

and we had a blast

it was funnnnnnn

we went to the booths

and saw the band playing

and then got VERY tasty drinks and food

it was AWESOMEEEE

I GOT TO TRY MEAD FOR THE FIRST TIME

THE REALLY SWEET KIND

we got to go to pupperoni's work and i raided the free snacks and it was awesome

i didn't even go to hyperpride in the end because i was all tuckered out from the fun lmao

BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER BEST PRIDE EVER

it was a really refreshing conversation

we discussed the... social mechanics of just fucking walking up to people and attempting to talk to them

"high risk, high reward" she said

it was a lot of good advice and opened my eyes to how little i've actually been trying at these things lol

y'know how i'll end a perfect day?

assassin's creed iv: black flag

actually no i wanna keep posting but i'll get to that in a bit

11/10 would pride again

also she showed me graphs and apparently i should NOT be just swallowing my estradiol

apparently the most effective way to take it is one pill every four hours lol

i even got to meet some of pupperoni's coworkers it was really neat!!!!!!

very trippy vibes being around all that tech stuff at night lol

they had

a gated parking lot

that's some fancy shit

what a good-ass fuckin pride

and that's only the first event of like four or five!!!!!!

the place we went had like minecraft lighting lmao

i think i'd been there before xD

it was all just... christmas lights and nothing else

hella chill vibes

I BROKE MY RECORD FOR MOST NUMBER OF IRL COMPLIMENTS IN A SINGLE DAY TOO!!!!!!!!!!!

at the next pride events i go to

i will take that girl's advice to heart

and go out of my way to be social as fuck lol

like

fuck it

wtf else am i there for? lol

that was like

the perfect information

exactly what i needed

at the very best moment possible

the older i've gotten the more and more just expecting things to fall into my lap socially has become extremely NOT a viable option lmaoooo

idk, it worked so well when i was younger

and my parents told me to not talk to people unless i was spoken to first

so

lotta shit to unlearn i guess lol

and it seems kind of ridiculous when you phrase it that way but that's pretty much what it was

things happening to me

i never initiated them

okay

next pride event

i think

is trans pride

https://transprideseattle.org/

the 23rd at volunteer park

i will do The Thing

The Scary Thing

and just find motherfuckers who're alone there too and... attempt to converse with them!!!

i will make a genuine attempt

if i'm stoned and/or buzzed enough i'll be fine

and even if not, fuck it, i'll still try

fuck it, why not? what have i got to lose? it's not like things could get any worse for me lmao

the worst that could happen is it's awk and i dip

i was planning to LARP an extrovert initially at the kickoff event but that asshole dude who i was trying to avoid ruined the whole vibe lmao

i think i'll start small

work my way up

find someone with a cool outfit and compliment them on it

i've never done that before lol

i almost said "nice skirt!" to someone at pride yesterday wearing a rainbow one but they were too far away and i didn't wanna yell and yeah lmao

i'm just thinking of that phase

"high risk, high reward"

lol