Ren - Moved to chitter.xyz @Nine@computerfairi.es

Confusion of course intensifies. This is... unexpected. Kobolds in waiter and maid uniforms are bustling about, happy as anything, and one who is clearly performing the role of [i]maître d'[/i] approaches with a bright, pleasant smile, and gives a little bow, offering a seat for the whole party, already being laid out with VERY fine tableware, comfy plush seats, and lit candles. Drinks are offered from a finely written menu on fine parchment too.

The kobold sees their confusion, and gives a short, but not unpleasant barking little laugh, and in stilted and somewhat broken, but still very understandable Common explains that they get "that look" a lot, but it's okay, and for them to come inside, no need for them to wait outside, and someone will see to them soon.

Confused, but not sensing danger they couldn't deal with, the party go inside, and find... a rather plush restaurant waiting area.

Upon approaching, a kobold guard (assumedly) who is sleeping at their post, startles awake, then looks surprised, and... waves, enthusiastically??, then rushes inside for a short bit, before coming back out and beaming brightly at the adventurers, welcoming them in with an arm wave, resuming their post as if nothing is amiss.

...Despite what the villagers said about nasty kobolds, this one is positively pleasant and polite. This confusion stays their hand.

Party decides to investigate, after all the king of this land is paying real handsomely to take down a dragon, and hey, killing dragons is pretty lucrative, right? But this IS kinda weird.
One of the party remembers hearing that kobolds serve dragons usually too, and the disappearances of people ARE pretty suspect, and the kobolds might be involved!
They easily track down the kobold's lair, in a mountain nearby, like, so easily it's practically signposted.

random idea popped into my head today:

A party of adventurers in a classic fantasy get tasked to take out a dragon that's terrorising the local villages, paid handsomely by a king.

Said party see no devastation, the villages seem perfectly fine and prosperous, the few people they bother to talk to just sort of shrug in confusion at the talk of a dragon like they've never heard of one being nearby, but they do mention sightings of kobolds. no destruction, just sightings of, and disappearances.

@BatElite @socks well i mean, it fits the theme! :o

@socks Legend of the Horngry Wolffox

@stadion@octodon.social why does this have to be an onion article i want this to be real ;;

....and it actually released today!? as in you can fuckin' buiy it???

...

...christ.

....what... the fuck?

...there's a new battletoads game?????

@jaye welcome to the fur-zone-a

@troubleMoney ...oh shit it is isn't it? :D *revels in plant name!*

@mavica *holds out arms for handcuffs so they can be dragged off to internet jail* Yeah I deserve this

@mavica more like faTAILity! :D