ScottinSoCal 🇺🇦 🕊 🏳‍🌈 @ScottSoCal@computerfairi.es

On the flip side, time card fraud *is* a felony, and people regularly go to jail for it. Timecard fraud is when an employee:

* Knows that their pay is determined by when they clock in and clock out
* Knowingly clocks in when they are not working, or clocks out significantly after they have stopped working

I don't understand why stealing $1000 in one direction is a felony that DAs give people years for, but in the other it's a civil matter where restitution and a fine are the usual punishments.

Trump donors are proof that man is the only animal on the planet that can be skinned more than once.

Accidentally used men’s body wash and had to mansplain to a woman riding a bicycle the correct way to ride a bicycle

My boss referred to my taking sick days as “constant short-notice requests for PTO” so I hope you’re all having a great day too

@ScottSoCal

It appears you already have one 🤓

Plot twist: The wheels on the bus have stopped.

You might want get a sense of humor. A literal world can be pretty miserable and frustrating.

7 February 1942 | A Polish friar, a michalite, Wojciech Nierychlewski CSMA perished in Auschwitz. In Kraków he was in charge of the publishing and printing house.

In the camp from 10 January 1942.
No. 25468

#Auschwitz #Birkenau #ww2 #Poland #Nazis #Germany #NeverForget #education #history #histodons #Remember #otd #facts #michalite #priest #friar

Claiming someone elses marriage is against your religion is like being angry at someone for eating a donut when you're on a diet. #samelove

Finally getting to some useful phrases in duolingo.

Rate my setup.

#MidCentury
#HighTech

yeah, it's all changed now, when my parents were growing up after the war you were lucky if you had one gender to share among the whole family, there was still rationing then mind you. If you were growing up somewhere rural like my mother there might not even be a gender in the whole village! Not really that long ago when you think about it...even when I was growing up in the eighties all my genders were hand me downs, I tell you something, kids these days don't know how good they've got it!!

There is trusting the laws of orbital mechanics on paper, and then there is strapping yourself into a maneuvering unit and wandering off from your ship 300 km above the surface of the Earth while moving at nearly 8 km/s.

McCandless spent one hour and 55 minutes untethered during this EVA, and the orbital period of the shuttle was just over 90 minutes. So unless I’m missing something, *Bruce McCandless completed a full orbit of Earth while disconnected from the shuttle*.

Strange week to have my name.

- I moved to Copenhagen, where every other company has "Dan" at the start of its name: Dan
- My ID at work is daben which my wife insists on reading as 大笨 - "big idiot"
- Now redditors are using the name "Dan" when they want chatGPT to roleplay as an asshole

A few winters ago, the city took one of those snowstorms that lasts a few days and the parks department had carved out the paths around the Tenney Park lagoon such that they looked like wide grooves in the white landscape. The lagoon, a shallow recess that takes overflow from Lake Mendota, ices over easily and solidly in the cold months and becomes one of the most active skating rinks in the city. I took a walk over there at dusk, following the cut paths as skaters glided just the other side of the white berm, and did so just in time to see the sun settle low out over the lake in such a way that everything white, which was EVERYthing, seemed to sparkle like some fantasyland. And just as I observed that singular moment of a kind of pure beauty that can never be recreated, my feet went out from under me and I fell square onto my back like a fucking cartoon. I lay there for a while, in nearly breathless anguish, wondering I could get up or if should dial 911 or if any of the skaters on the other side of the berm and seen me just swoop and disappear out of sight below the snow like a stupid puppet. Apparently none had, or, if they had, they didn't investigate to see if I was dead or dying, the dicks.

When I could breathe again, I creaked unsurely to my feet and made a vow that, from that day forward, all beautiful sunsets could kiss my ass, and, while I pissed blood the next day and could barely get out of bed for a few days more, I still think it is sad that no one saw that because, just at face value, it fucking HAD to have been hilarious.

my mother explaining EXACTLY how she wants her food prepared as my father silently pleads with the server not to spit in it