jk I'm all about that bread @danishcookies@computerfairi.es

mewtwo looks like a $900 vibrator.

hmm theres a small non corporate gym 10 minutes away by bike that is decently affordable and they give you a free personal training session when you get a monthly membership... maybe i'll do it

me when someone looks over my shoulder as i’m composing my next TOOT!

epic

dont fucking @ me if you dont butter your cereal 😤 😤

skadiddle skadoodle someone touch my noodle

sometimes you just unknowingly insult the president of iceland to his face

i hope the movie sonic has needle teeth

i...i know its gonna be porn but how can i NOT click with TAGS LIKE THESE

*loses at a video game*
*just starts violently screaming and ripping my clothes off down to the nude*

Me when I start the car and "shape of you" or "girls like you" is playing on the radio and I'm waiting for my bluetooth to hurry up and connect:

@dankwraith there is no shortage of nurses, but there is a shortage of nurse jobs. those "job creators" have strange priorities that don't seem to involve creating a lot of jobs 🤔

@dconley @kyzh One of my first children's books was "Mecki im Schlaraffenland" (1952), in German from Germany.
Sooo, yeah, apparently Germany is a land of candy and chocolate streets. ;-)

WHO UNFOLLOWED SASUKE

Cute. Babey. Babey..........
My babye

BAby. Babey. Look at the babeys.