jk I'm all about that bread @danishcookies@computerfairi.es

Me, age 12: *on AIM* why doesnt anyone want to talk to me?
also me: *always invisible or away*

- name 3 cities
- say "uno, dos, tres, dale!"
- say "mr worldwide"

you can do these in any order but all three steps are very important

Update on spiders:

The sac spider is fully 1cm long not including legs. She rarely stretches out fully but is well over 1 inch long including legs.

The orbweaver's latest web is over 6 inches in diameter and anchored to the windowsill, not just the potted plant. Things *might* be getting a bit out of hand…

#spiders #smolfrens

Someone please create a #fantasy setting where heroic/sympathetic characters ride #tarantulas the size of horses.

It must be such a smooth ride, with the extra legs

also, let's redeem #spiders from the reputation Tolkien gave them

Is there a queer ballet company? I would be *so* here for that.

everyday i thank god stand up comedy is dead. it’s the one good thing to come out of our cultural shift

this is a normal and well-adjusted response to being broken up with for being an asshole

mathematically ranking women on a hotness scale is a totally not fucked up thing to do. definitely.

he’s stealing a bunch of people’s pictures now

mark went online to bitch about being broken up with. what a tool

mark just got his ass kicked by words

this movie is doing a really shitty job of making me like mark right from the start

@007 plenty more where that came from

i showed you my fursuit please respond

@lynnesbian
1) F****
2) M*********, MI
3) Pet/Good Girl

PSA: I am not a "hon", I am not a "honey", I am not a "sweetheart", I am not whatever other infantile sexist buzzwords you have the "wit" to come up with, and if you bring your insufferable condescending bullshit to my backyard i'm gonna turn the fucking hose on you.

home of the boring and ugly suckling babe

the real little shop of horrors is captialism. folks

light yagami did not deserve a goth gf