currently on cybre.space @maunzikation@computerfairi.es

I'm super glad that all parts of the class, lecture and exercise thingy, are recorded, but… I don't even watch the lecture part because that's so loong and I can't focus on it and going there would be possible and better buut it's so early in the morning and noooo.

Basically, this is the best version of uni stuff that I can imagine for me, but I still can't do it :s

Also, uni thoughts…

I'm super glad that I don't have to hand in homework, the exercise sheets are not mandatory, I'm like 3 behind and I would never be able to do them in time, but also… I'm 3 behind how am I ever going to catch up

I'm super glad that attendance isn't mandatory, because going to class is super stressful, but also… I haven't been there in forever and I don't watch the recordings because they're made in a group that's taught by a terribly annoying person

(I'm always proud and happy when I (begin to) understand a thing with numbers or maths, but usually, I don't.)

Maybe I should finally give up on uni, and join the #pcode people (right now I don't because I'm afraid that would distract me from uni stuff) and have fun with things that don't involve any things that I'm super bad at

(I couldn't focus on the site aimed at kids that explained how to do it, and have no concept of numbers or recursion whatsoever)
(but it works)
(then I looked up solutions and this time i _could_ focus and welp, what i saw might have embarrassed me)

good news I think I found one of the least sensible ways to find the greatest common divisor

@antifahnen @distelfliege oooh that sounds great. i guess i've just had some bad experience with a psychoanalyst ("a", not "my", thankfully) who was super into freud and kept burdening people with shitty and uncalled for / unconsensual interpretations of things they said in friendly and mentor-ly contexts. good to know that that's not a core part of the actual thing :)

@distelfliege @antifahnen yes i also think that's really interesting! i'm drawn to the hands-on aspects but i'm worried about some other things so yes, interested :)

@antifahnen @distelfliege (sitting in a different chair, getting into their posture) and saying what you think they might think about a certain issue. but we only got to that once, and while it did something positive for me at first, i had the impression that what i said then was kind of used against me because the focus seemed to shift to "100% understanding that person" instead of what that meant for me.

@distelfliege @antifahnen mhm, I don't think we actually did a lot of what's typical for it. it's apparently focused on relationships and roles and stuff. for me that meant sometimes choosing stones/little plushies/little figures to represent people in my life or aspects of myself and… pretty much just putting them on the table and talking about them. one typical thing seems to be imagining you're some other person

@distelfliege @antifahnen the therapist that I just stopped seeing does psychodrama x) but I didn't know that before the first appointment (only had her email address), and I liked her so I gave it a try. i don't think the method was the only issue, but I could have guessed that it wouldn't be great either.

@antifahnen ah, ok. that sounds great! :>

@antifahnen oh, psychoanalysis is one of the types i'm not really considering for me. but, thank you. does the .___. mean that you don't like it that much? or is it re answering questions?