Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

@LANthus i don't even soulsborne lore but also it might be good to note that one of the reasons it's gibberish is because

latin suffers so badly as a language with machine translation. all-case-endings no-word-order is something that google translate just throws its hands up and gives up over.

so it may very well be that there was meaning intended at some point in there! but oh boy good luck figuring that one the fuck out after google's dined on it

spoonie culture is taking selfies in the waiting room

cw for selfie, eye contact, snapchat filter that put a butterfly on my head

listen in my defense, look at this shit

i don't wanna get out in this fuckery, do YOU?

at least i can coordinate around my cute umbrella i guess grumble grumble hiss groan

@gnarlyanimal@snouts.online oh, i think the original was "how to talk to short people"

e.g. just look down, don't do the weird squat like they're a little kid

my schedule says "you gotta get up and get ready for your doctor's appointment"

the weather says "stay inside and play splatoon forever"

@lynnesbian see also regional variants of the Techbroius Fuckboii:

T. Fuckboii, s. Macintoshii - "well you wouldn't be having this problem if you used apple like i do. they don't get viruses you know"

T. Fuckboii, s. Linuxus - "this is why you should just run linux! what do you mean you need accessibility and documentation? if you don't know how to do that you just shouldn't use computers, ugh!"

@lynnesbian ah yes, the wild techbro

"technology isn't for using or understanding! it's for lording over people and feeling really smug all the time. what's that? helping someone? why would i help anyone? i'm here to feel superior!"

@maple a carrot cake muffin but with pecans instead of walnuts because walnuts are trash tier nuts and i will defend this stance until my grave.

also with cream cheese icing but with like a caramel swirl or some shit on top too where they do the like kinda marbled design where you drag a toothpick through it? yeah

@InspectorCaracal peanut butter and banana milkshake.

oh man that seems like a cool game but i know like. three people? on here

...fuckit, new game i can do

reply and i will randomly assign you a dessert and/or dish of food that i think suits you based off of glancing at your profile

@hal@slime.global idk why this makes me laugh so much, but it does https://imgur.com/gallery/08ign

@hal@slime.global well

this is how zoologists do it, and it's kind of hilarious

it's just me dramatically yelling WILL NO-ONE RID ME OF THIS TROUBLESOME UTERUS outside the obgyn honestly

allyship is supporting surgeries and therapies of transplanted uterus etc. into those that are transitioning and want them,

while also knowing you're off the table as a candidate to donate not because of any personal convictions but because if someone else got this fucking bullshit i'm pretty sure it would be violating lemon law and fair goods acts in at least 15 states

listen

it's not my fault that Anakin "Vader" Skywalker

a) is a bratty sub of the highest order

b) should not be in charge of anyone including himself and eventually comes to realize this

if the non-english-major nerds are staring at that punchline, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wife_of_Bath%27s_Tale#Female_sovereignty

also pls note this line in the synopsis:

>The Knight responds by saying that the choice is hers, an answer which pleases her greatly

it just works y'all