Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

this story idea i've had simmering away has now gotten more complicated because my brain went "ok yes, narratively, it makes sense for good-guy-ganon-trapped-in-suffering-now-finally-freed to die here as being given freedom to do so, stopping a cycle of half-reincarnation suffering... but.... what if he didn't and the zelda/link/sidon polycule gains a lanky gerudo man with the temperament of a nervous chihuahua after being tortured for millennia scrambled his psyche like an egg"

in the video game series Legend of Zelda, the triforce is the ultimate object of power whose parts are greater than the sum of their whole when working in balance; however, all victories shown are temporary and rely on imbalance, usually of the hero winning. therefore, in this essay, i will definitively prove that the ultimate end of the timeline and the series MUST be the creation of a happy, consensual, and stable link/zelda/ganon polycule,

i have begun Enstickering my purse hooks

first pass.... done..... pearl and marina are uhhhh a little big but it's fine it's fine. it's fine

@QuestForTori i just made a face in real life like someone had shoved a rotten egg under my nose. excellent work

i can't believe "taking the measure of man" has really meant "real bastard dps checks" this whole time

me before the final dungeon: well i know emet-selch is acting unreasonable in his grief but he's still pretty sympathetic, i feel bad

me, hitting the second boss of that dungeon: EMET-SELCH IS A LITTLE BEYOTCH AKSHUALLY AND I'M GONNA MURDER HIS FACE CLEAN OFF

i made a bitter political joke in which i called our president 'trump antoinette' and then immediately followed it with "just don't make me get a champagne glass modeled off his breasts" and, friends,

i am in hell. i am in hell imagining that and i have nobody but myself to blame. hell. i am here. i am in it. h e l l .

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/marie-antoinette-champagne-coupe_n_1424686?fbclid=IwAR3XupLClBbxJqI1_9c-WZmE8zUp6VeQb9JvPH6GiR8GQYQN__AfiQPIVo8 (ok so she had milk glasses not champagne ones but it's a persistent cultural myth so)

@eightbitsamurai@elekk.xyz can i offer a challenger to the whitest thing ever found?

https://www.southernliving.com/recipes/pineapple-casserole-recipe?fbclid=IwAR3nx6K3xTkll8IUtUlyuJBr248Q2MDw_K_pF-oRp5ENkY8tmZAJ0Mz1TQk

she's putting out those social marks that are above and beyond having headphones on as a "please leave me alone" signal. she's wearing on her sleeve (literally!) how much she is in pain and needs to be treated sympathetically. it's why the boorish fool is meant to be so skewered to the original audience: even in patriarchal victorian sensibilities, he's so incredibly out of line it's painful. he should be defending her, not harassing her!

the layer here that victorians would instantly know and we may not in modernity is the look she gives the viewer - one of deep pain and sadness, along with "not this shit again from another boring blowhard man" - is directly connected to her clothes. she's in mourning, and given she is travelling unaccompanied, a victorian would likely infer that it is her parents or spouse who have died - someone she is the closest to.

so not only is the irritating gentleman awful, but doubly so to victorians.

thinking of a comment hours earlier

i can't help but see this painting as a prototypical MRA gamergater fuckface. we've known - *men* have known, after all, a man painted this - for a long time that some shit is just plain boorish. it's just not done.

and so from Berthold Woltze - The Irritating Gentleman. cw for eye contact.

finally followed down a hunch and i am fucking elated that i can show via measurement my shoulder is 2 inches bigger than the nonfucked one (due to swelling) and is about 3 degrees hotter on the non-contact thermometer (not after immediate icepack use anyway)

CAN'T TELL ME IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD NOW, DOCS! #spoonie

@eightbitsamurai@elekk.xyzthe eternal irony of cringe culture is that nothing is actually as cringe-inducing as people defining their self-worth by putting down the excitement of others

it's a longstanding sign of terrible boorishness that has been lambasted through the ages, and the fact that "cringe culture" embraces it is a sign that it's not really about cringing at all, ironically enough

yes the packing peanuts ARE compostable, hollydog, but i don't think they mean them to be composted in the way you are thinking

my dog is convinced that my package from lush is full of delicious dog treats

@monorail occasionally i think about this but then i do it anyway because i enjoy horrifying people with the ways white folks use mayonnaise to collect unrelated foods together and call it a salad (and how the salads are Good, Actually)

so i found the show Money For Nothing on netflix, which is some british reality tv where a lady finds shit people are throwing out and asks if she can take them and ends up working with experts and artisans to make them into things, sells them, and returns the profits to the original owners

anyway the first episode has a lady blacksmith

who talks design with soot and a little bit of blood on her face while eating an apple

dear wlw: if this made you swoon, go watch it

i have encountered my first salty sue at the little macro i have right now (at the start of dungeons, saying hello and warning folks that i'm playing largely on mouse because of my shoulder and not able to type much)

he declared "LAME" and marked me Target To Ignore - while wearing his mentor crown, too

and

i then got the joy of seeing him fuck up many mechanics in a row 😂