Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal that is the cry of a joyless man who cannot laugh at Crockpot Cold Water

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal the best use for neural networks right now is "we have made computers smart enough to be stupid in ways that are HILARIOUS" and i am so glad many people on the internet have realized this and set them loose on things like 'make me some my little pony names' or 'make me some recipe titles' which make me laugh until i cry a little

it is for e-slapstick, not real work, lmao

@InspectorCaracal well, it uh... it tastes like a cheap orange gummy candy, plus There's Vittamins Up Ins Here tang, plus turmeric... just spicy mouth, because it's a LOT of turmeric

i think you could make orange and turmeric work, actually - but in a savory context. you could probably do a really nice chicken dish with orange and turmeric in there, sort of a sweet and sour meets halfway to a yellow curry thing

@InspectorCaracal see orange spice tea is nice because you got like, cinnamon in there. cinnamon goes good with orange and sweet!

TURMERIC LESS SO......

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal at some point, all one can really do is say "i'm not sure if these techbros are criminals or just criminally stupid" while shaking your head and figuring out how to square up against them LOL

i know it drives Family Member Who Actually Works In AI mildly crazy because a lot of the mindset re: AI development comes out of sheer laziness and being more in love with wanting to use "neural network 'cos it sounds neat" then actually know what they're doing lmao

in my defense!!!!! it has a shitwhack of turmeric in it!!!! turmeric is very nice but i am not sold on it being a great taste sensation when put into a sweet orange gummy.

i mean it's better than tasting the fish oil but still. ohno.gif

i was gonna kvetch but this makes a much funnier self-roast:

How white is Harp, you may ask?

So white that she just said a gummy vitamin was too spicy for her.

🥁 BA DUM TISS

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal yeah i can see that actually

i think it's plausible they may have started out guided by egotistical ignorance, but so many people pouring money into them at this point... don't have those excuses

star wars gets treated a little more gently in that i will actually go through the buffet.

harry potter increasingly gets the treatment as exemplified from the following reference

Do Midichlorians Exist? well, dear reader, it all depends on if it's convenient for me in this particular fanfiction! there's your answer!

(this is the point at which i slide on a pair of sunglasses and pop a wheelie on my motorbike, because i am a Supremely Cool Dude.)

the only way to write fanfiction for star wars and stay sane is to approach canonical material not as a strict set of laws to all be adhered to or else, but rather a tasty buffet where you can fill your plate with whatever appeals, with the complete freedom to skip over the dubious-looking shrimp scampi

just carve off the tasty bits

anyway the real reason i won't do my obnoxious spinoff up-my-own-ass star wars fic idea is because one of the newer films changed the location of where darth vader's castle is and i don't want to deal with five bajillion comments telling me i'm wrong for whichever one i chose to write lmao

@InspectorCaracal @zensaiyuki basically we need to rely on AI less for important shit, and more shit like "hey AI, here is a two-legged critter, figure out the most efficient walk for it to walk on the moon", then we put googly eyes on the results, especially all the midway points it tried working towards the best solution

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal see also: silicon valley's love affair with "disrupting" instead of saying "okay, we're not doing things like this. i wonder why? maybe i should research that. it seems like we have a lot of regulations around this thing. i wonder why they exist. maybe i should read a book about it."

i'm just waiting until the new Apple (tm) iTriangleShirtwaistFactory is announced tbh

@zensaiyuki @InspectorCaracal and in what's happening now, a lot of times society HAS seen fit to forbid bad solutions - it's just that the programmers doing this think that things like "looking at the current laws regulating equality in housing" is a waste of time because their box of numbers is more enlightened than that and anyway they're not interested in learning why such laws exist, so

WHOOPS IT'S RACIST REDLINING WITH EXTRA STEPS

@InspectorCaracal i have done the EXACT opposite of convincing everyone this is a bad idea, haven't i.

@InspectorCaracal and then i'd probably include fucking recipes between chapters because Mirou got her job and keeps it by virtue of being able to do fancy cooking, but mostly just being really really really good at soul food

and ofc the former slave boy turned sith lord is like "........oh fuck yes is that some fucking frybread thank GOD these people keep trying to feed me SEVEN-TIER FUCKING ASPICS on account of being a HIGH RANKING DIGNITARY i'm so sick of it thank god you made curry"

@InspectorCaracal please don't tempt me it'd be a full 15-part series about Dasje scuttling around this castle like Jeeves if Jeeves got sent off to ninja school that one time and Bertie Wooster has had all his english charm replaced entirely with murder so it's just him doing exactly what his employer was about to tell him to do before even being asked while his wife makes really good mushroom curry two floors away in the kitchen

@aradinfinity EXACTLY! it's the same reason everyone i've ever met who has watched ATLA is ready to throw fucking down in Zuko's defense at any moment

letting people know redemption is possible, even if you fuck up, and that doing better is always something you can and should do - that's compelling!!!

i mean fuck it's basically what drives the story for the Yakuza game franchise.

sometimes where there's smoke, there's fire, and the fire is a real good concept.

i mean, then i go on weird tangents about how my favourite OCs i've ever made are darth vader's valet and cook, who are surprisingly chill folks. don't get me wrong they're avid fans of their employer so kind of terrifying in their own ways, but i also fucking love them and they're some of the best characters i've ever come up with go team Dasje and Mirou sorry i only got to write you in for like five chapters and a spinoff oneshot