Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

realtime footage of me looking at my fediverse timeline

whenever i read/think of the word 'mango' there's about an 80% chance something deep in my brain immediately replies with

MAN GO BEEP BEEP, CAR GO VROOM!

no idea where this came from, no idea why it does that. no idea why it decided this pun takes precedence over 'mango is a tasty fruit'. it just do. thanks, brain.

y'all i think i have conclusive proof i'm related to european royalty at some point

however

all the genes i got are just for this one curl. just this one. none of the other bits of my body. just this one singular curl that decided it didn't want to go up in a bun clip and has now decided it wants to sit out beside my face perfectly goddamn curled.

??????

so in summary: Alas, Cishet Dudes.

with a side of This Wigglytuff Is Still Stressed, Mom Still In Hospital, She's Ok But 'Family Member In Hospital' Is One Heck Of A Debuff.

please have this pangolin playing in the mud as compensation for all this ranting i've been putting out, and i promise i'm not usually such an absolute pillar of salt

anyway that "let's talk about this tomorrow when we both have cooled off a bit" i am fairly sure was actually a "i want to get back to rping with my cool new friends, so i'm gonna do that instead of giving you any more attention and time at all, bye".

so if that postponed "let's clarify this when both calm" talk never comes, i guess that'll be my answer, lol.

i mean jesus christ, if we're going full My Fair M'Lady, you could at least have the decency to not immediately degenerate right back into awfulness when i've just finished singing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QS0pNPw958M after you have gone to the ball and awed everyone by acting like a reasonable and compassionate normal human being

not that anyone here has irked me, i'm just yelling into the e-void here about how exhausted i am at men who expect me to do an incredible amount of emotional labor.

AND THEN, AFTER I TEACH THEM, THE LESSON DOESN'T EVEN STICK

well i woke up this morning and am still grumpy, largely at men. sorry, men.

i'm fairly certain that they are both going to climb in my window at 4am, haggard and gaunt and corpse-like and spouting pure rage, to climb my ceiling, turn their heads around 180 degrees, and shriek at me (either political nonsense or about how i should contour or both) until i am dead from sheer terror and force of vitriol they have pumped out of their mouths.

do you all think lining my window with salt would help

honestly, i try very hard to not talk shit about people's appearances. i firmly believe in the view espoused by roald dahl, where if you are a good person, no matter what your bones are like or whatever, that goodness will come pouring out of you, and you will be lovely.

however i also believe in the inverse

and can i just say, ann coulter and jefree star are two of the scariest people i think i have ever seen on god's green earth

"People Other Than You Have Feelings Sometimes", a fun Discover-And-Learn activity workbook for white cishet dudes! includes two pages of special stickers and a three-pack of crayons!

i'm so tired of holding the hands of cishet dudes and putting in emotional labor and worst of all not having any of the "perhaps think about thing other than you? sometimes????" actually stick

anyway i think i'm done now, unless i find a generator where it's D.A.R.E. logos so i can tell people to Just Say No To The Patriarchy

anyway, in summary,

"i can do a womanly thing better than all the women" gives momentary power, but it only gives it when you agree with the patriarchy that gay men are closer to women than men, and that women are fundamentally lesser. this is a bullshit premise, and you need to emphatically not buy into it.

the patriarchy isn't right. the patriarchy will never be right. don't listen to it. don't buy into it. just don't.