Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

apparently people on twitter are debating that a smash brothers tourney is going to have a therapy dog room and i am so, so tempted to rip in there and poke at the salty mcwhiners with "oh i see, it's because they figured a slobbery, affectionate dog grooming you was an upgrade from your usual 'didn't shower for seven weeks', i can see why you may be upset with this outcome" but i'm not gonna i'm gonna just tell the tired old joke here instead

honestly though the loan word we need - again, probably from german - is "the sensation at looking at someone's interest - say, in their DeviantArt favourites - and knowing instantly that, despite the pictures being safe for work in technicality, this is absolutely somebody's wank bank material"

i may say let's just call it DeviantArt because it seems the website is a good 80% people doing the "i'm not touching you, i'm not touching you" approach to following the "no outright porn" rule

we need a word - probably loaned from german - for "the exhausted, pale shade of might-as-well-laugh-to-keep-from-crying feeling when you notice callouts naming someone as doing really ugly shit, and you had clocked this person as suspect or even blocked/muted them weeks ago, so you have a moment of going 'whelp, still got it, i guess'... to give yourself pause from the unrelenting misery of it all"

but i am better at sourcing Cute Shit, so i'm gonna try to make sure the boys get a fair shake this year too. dinosaurs i think are the way to go.

of course gendering toys is bullshit to begin with but i don't think i can make all the first graders listen to that in a full half hour lecture on halloween, and besides, it's all in the same bowl so if a boy wants a cute thing or a girl wants a dinosaur it all works out

(i suppose i could be seen to be making some sort of elaborate political statement here with not handing out candy but instead opting for small toys and the like, but really, it's not a childhood obesity thing or a healthy eating thing

it's an "i think a toy you can use more than once is more interesting than yet another candy bar" thing)

(last year i did a bunch of those squishy stress toys to give out and the kids went BONKERS)

the next year apparently there was at least one group where they'd come back after hearing our house talked up at school

then this past halloween that has become multiple groups excitedly flocking to our neighborhood *mainly for our house*, and one of them had gotten terrified that we'd moved after getting the address one off and just getting candy from our neighbors

i suppose i should actually explain about accidentally becoming The Best House On Halloween

so about three years back i realized we didn't have anything for halloween, no candy, and it was the day of so i just sort of panicked and went through stuff i'd gotten from KawaiiBox monthly boxes but wasn't particularly interested in

we usually don't get too many trick-or-treaters, but the few that came by LOVED IT

"but harp," you may be saying, "it is AUGUST."

yes but i accidentally made my parents' house, where i live, the number one stop for trick-or-treaters, and so i should put in my orders of little toys pretty early. i like to give stuff from china a full month to get here, and even more time if it's mission-critical and i may have to decide if something is working or not

so today's thoughts (besides I Can't Get The Got Dam Dead Battery Oot Me Computer Mouse) is

i should start preparing for halloween

very petty whinge before i go off to shower etc.:

i thought i had been so clever, building two sheds in stardew valley, so i can put more casks in to age wine BUT NO. casks only work in YOUR BASEMENT. and it only let me know this until after i had made and placed a bunch and was all "nope sorry can't put anything in these here"

GRUMBLE GRUMBLE.

i wish there was a 'break down' option in stardew valley so i could recoup the materials a little but oh well, i'll just make them keg and jam houses

ok my 10 dollar elite gaming mouse from amazon may be on its last legs

not because it's broken

but because i can't get the fucking battery out to change it

i feel like i've definitely developed a skill of niffling through aliexpress for cool shit - and more than that, niffling through *taobao* wish some success. if i could be my own importer so to speak, it's something that could work and be profitable, when i'm a bit more able-bodied and feel like i can consistently do a bunch of mail one week out of every month

the above is a recettear reference please don't kill me

anyway

it's just occurred to me that patreon would be a pretty great way to do a monthly subscription box type service on a small scale

monthly payments done automatically, different tier levels for different size boxes, even a little community feature so you can have people talking about what they got in their box and giving feedback...

i'm about > < this close to calling up my pharmacy and chewing out whichever little airheaded trainee picks up, using phrases like "do you think i take this medication for fun? do you think taking adhd medicine to function is a thing i can do only when i feel like it? do you think it's an optional amusement?" and "when did you decide your new motto was 'we don't do the thing until you ask the third time, even if we told you we did'?"

my dog has been wandering around wanting to bark and play and you know what finally got her to settle down?

putting out the new blanket my mom got for me on my legs

it is the very soft velvety type and that is Her Favourite. she literally came running to sniff it and begged until i put my feet up so she could snuggle blanket