@compostablespork @hollie Something we've noticed trying to improve at visualization: we had situations sometimes where we knew we were processing visual information, but we couldn't see it, even in a separate internal space. In our case, it turned out we were denying our internal visualization because it wasn't as detailed as we knew our memory to be, and accepting that it would be vague colored blobs made it possible to see.
@hollie To elaborate on nonsensory thoughts, over time we learned to be aware of those, and seems like all thoughts start out that way, and then they can go through a headmate who internal "speaks" them. If we don't speak them, they don't lead to other thoughts and can easily fade from awareness. Which is how we learned to calm our inner voices.
@hollie "How are you not driven to instantaneous madness by the incessant chattering?" I pretty much was until I learned to calm it down[1]. Most[2] thoughts still take the form of voices[3], but they're not happening all the time anymore.
[1] Before learning that I had no idea it was possible to change.
[2] Some thoughts are entirely nonsensory. It's more like connections between abstract concepts.
[3] Yes, multiple voices. It's been a large part of how we tell headmates apart.
glad someone wrote an article that covers how almost half of covid transmission may be asymptomatic, why being covid cautious is a social justice issue, and the loss and loneliness that comes with being covid cautious: https://boulderweekly.com/news/covid-safe-colorado/
This is your periodic reminder that ambulatory wheelchair users exist. Many folks think wheelchairs are only for those who can't walk at all, or folks who can only take a couple steps.
Wheelchairs and electric scooters are used due to pain, weakness, balance issues, orthostatic intolerance, etc.
#Disability #Wheelchairs #DynamicDisability #ChronicIllness #MEcfs
@budsofstone I still prefer it over gentoo, at least I don't have to wait around for (most) packages to build.
I don't recommend Arch though. Having to install and configure every piece of basic functionality is a chore, and I'm really not seeing any benefits from it. If I had to redo it I'd probably do another Manjaro install.
@m Do you want me to answer that?
plurality, negative
@mavica_again I pull on the thread until I have something I can work on. Which usually ends up being something like a headmate with a concern, or something we're not properly understanding about ourselves. -Esme
So this poll supports what I suspected - a bunch of guides treat tape as the most common tucking method and lead with that, but that’s the least common for trans fems. Drag queens use tape a lot because their costumes and performances require a really tight and secure tuck. But what trans women are most often looking for is more the everyday casual support for alleviating dysphoria and helping clothes sit the way they want them to on their bodies. And we generally aren’t jumping around and dancing on stage in our day to day life.
And this also matches what I’m seeing in studies on transfems and tucking too.
Just seems that so many of these assume basically that drag queen style tucking is the most common. Most of the “risks” discussed in these guides are also only applicable to that method, with suggestions like shaving beforehand. And this rubs me the wrong way - there’s a lot of trans-related support out there that never involves a trans woman in the process.
Gisele Pelicot’s ex husband sentenced to twenty years in prison - and all fifty of the men tried with him have been found guilty and will serve jail time. Shame HAS changed sides.
I’m incredibly grateful for what Gisele has accomplished. She flipped the narrative. She gave up her right to privacy and anonymity so that the whole world could see what these monsters did to her. She refused to be made into a victim, refused to be blamed or shamed for what they did to her.
I wrote an article about her story - the role medical misogyny played in what happened to her and why ‘Not All Men’ rings hollow to us right now.
I expressly said that now is NOT the time to yell ‘Not All Men’ at us - because in this particular case - it was a great many men. Men from all ages, backgrounds and walks of life.
It was her own husband of fifty years. Her neighbour. Fathers and husbands. It was too many men.
The men who were approached by her husband and declined to assault Gisele? They didn’t go to the police. They didn’t get her help. They patted themselves on the back for being ‘good men’ for simply not raping an unconscious woman.
The worst part? We may never know how many of them there were.
I was scared to share this article. I was afraid of blowback from people who are unwilling and/or unable to accept just how bad rape culture is. How deep the rot of patriarchy goes.
One of the first comments I got was a man telling me to stop painting all men as rapists. That most men are ‘very fond’ of women. That he ‘likes them a lot’ and that I shouldn’t worry so much because he’s sending me a hug.
He literally commented with ‘not all men’ on an article pleading with men to stop yelling over us. And he saw absolutely nothing wrong with this. In fact - he went on to say that this case is an anomaly and it’s what prisons are for - but most men are good and I need to recognize that.
Let me say this one more time - the ONLY thing about this case that’s an anomaly is the sheer scope and horror of it.
Rape is not an anomaly. It’s almost never perpetrated by a stranger. The vast majority of rapes are committed by someone the woman knew and trusted and believed to be a ‘good man.’
You don’t know until it’s too late - and that’s exactly why we’re asking you to stop saying ‘Not All Men.’
Please - listen to us. Learn. Speak up FOR us instead of OVER us. Be an ally and condemn these acts instead of trying to act like they’re the outliers. They aren’t.
This happens too damn much, we are fed up, and we won’t be silent any longer.
Shame IS changing sides and it will be because we won’t back down.
https://www.disabledginger.com/p/gisele-pelicot-medical-misogyny-and
#giselepelicot #abuse #sexualassault #notallmen #misogyny #patriarchy #rapeculture
It's amazing to me that this can exist in the open. I have to figure a lot of people using it don't understand the risks of proxying others' Internet traffic. (Also, apparently people are only using it to add latency to their connections, which could probably have been done in a simpler and safer way.) https://arstechnica.com/security/2024/12/vpn-used-for-vr-game-cheat-sells-access-to-your-home-network/
A thought I keep coming back to:
If programming is a large part of your life (professionally or not), then it's remarkably difficult to completely waste your time while programming.
It often _feels_ like it, whenever you didn't solve the immediate problem. But skill is your most important resource, and every line you write trains and builds skill.
Even code you shouldn't have written, or that reviewers hate, or that doesn't work.
Sometimes it's _only_ practice – but that's still not nothing!
@InfiniteNutshell In their defense(?) I've seen them very consistently put class action notifications in spam.