currently on cybre.space @maunzikation@computerfairi.es

I dreamed something about many kittens, but more like bunny kittens, and their parent cat

it was weird and not as floofly as it could have been.

I only ever look at Coursera things once, right after I join them, and that makes me feel so guilt ~.~

@tamallez if you search for "dissociation" on this list there are a few links about managing it: https://mentalillnessmouse.wordpress.com/helpfulresources/

what works is different for everyone. personally, when it got kind of intense, i'd follow the edges of the room i was in with my eyes and that gave me some feeling of… existing. sometimes that was too much, and i'd just imagine them, or trace the edge of a table with my fingers. i hope you find something :)

@distelfliege danke :) *versucht das jetzt wirklich*

Srsly emotions are the worst

I want to sleep but what if I still have feelings about things tomorrow

*punches a pillow*

I
WILL NOT
FIND A SENSIBLE
WAY TO
DEAL
WITH
MY
EMOTIONS

you can do it but you end up not getting anywhere beyond that wall really, so why would you

Trying to do things is so similar to running into a (fairly fluffy but definitely sturdy) wall

*gets stuck in some muddy sticky stuff* ah yes, learning new things is fun and refreshing

also my brain has this thing that prevents it from thinking too many complicated thoughts, I think

which is very kind, but sometimes, I would actually like to think 1 or more complicated thought

i mean WITHOUT snow chains obviously, snow chains would make it a thing that both works and is fun / an exciting adventure

my brain is very similar to "being stuck in snow with a car that can't do that much snow", actually