maple "mavica" syrup [6502] @mavica_again@computerfairi.es

woop boop

my secondary pronouns are also byte/byteself which people don't use often but warms me up whenever they do

my pronouns are it/its and if you think they're dehumanizing THAT'S THE POINT

this is the first time in years since i had a dream so vivid and lucid. my dreams don't usually have real people in it, including myself

i'm not ok

"are you coming back with us?" "no. pull the trigger." she doesn't. i move to touch my forehead right to the barrel "pull THE FUCKING TRIGGER"

i woke up hyperventilating

"are you coming back with us?" "no. pull the trigger." she doesn't. i move to touch my forehead right to the barrel "pull THE FUCKING TRIGGER"

i woke up hyperventilating

my dad finally says his first words to me "i ought to spank you". "then do! i'm right here!" he just walks away and i keep cursing them for being cowards. my sister shows up again but this time with a gun pointed at me.

my dad finally says his first words to me "i ought to spank you". "then do! i'm right here!" he just walks away and i keep cursing them for being cowards. my sister shows up again but this time with a gun pointed at me.

the three immediately turn around and go but of course that's not good enough for me. i chase after them to the stairs (we were on the second floor) yelling at them how i don't need them anymore.

the three immediately turn around and go but of course that's not good enough for me. i chase after them to the stairs (we were on the second floor) yelling at them how i don't need them anymore.

my mother was clearly trying badly to hide how appalled she was, as usual, and my dad had his usual stone look of disapproval. they try to stay polite and my mom and i quietly argue and i finish with "you're free to leave".

my mother was clearly trying badly to hide how appalled she was, as usual, and my dad had his usual stone look of disapproval. they try to stay polite and my mom and i quietly argue and i finish with "you're free to leave".

had a dream i was living somewhere else, a fairly big place but clearly something like cohab or a squatter building or something. my girlfriends were living in there with me. some other things happened and then my parents and my sister showed up saying they came to visit.

back in my day at least i got told off and banned from IRC channels for throwing a pity party and people threatening to rape me in queries. Bring back that internet

Therapy never fucking helped me

Nobody cares about you. Nobody is coming to help you. You're going to die alone and sad

what the fuck do you want me to reach out for when the best i can get out of threatening to kill myself is Twitter Safety Notification