maple classic™ 
well @LaserScheme i made it
despite your directions
ah, superintendent @squirrel! welcome! i hope you're prepared for an unforgettable luncheon!
@squirrel
*walks into the kitchen to check the oven*
*gasp!* oh egads! my roast is ruined!
*looks out the window at the nearby Furry Burger*
but what if...i were to purchase fast food and disguise it as my own cooking?
ohhohohoho...delightfully devilish, Laser!
*barges into kitchen*
wh-
@LaserScheme !!!
@squirrel
superintendent! i was just, uh...just stretching my calves on the windowsill
isometric exercise! care to join me?
why is there smoke coming out of your oven @LaserScheme
@squirrel
uhh...no! that isn't smoke, it's steam, steam from the steamed clams we're having!
*rubs belly* mmm...steamed clams!
@LaserScheme
*squints* ...
*leaves kitchen*
@squirrel
phew! *wipes brow*
*climbs out the windows and runs over to the Furry Burger*
@squirrel
*a short while later...*
*enters the dining room holding a tray of food*
superintendent, i hope you're ready for mouthwatering hamburgers!
@LaserScheme
*fiddling with a napkin*
i thought we were having steamed clams
@squirrel
oh, no! i said steamed hams!
that's what i call hamburgers!
@LaserScheme
you call hamburgers "steamed hams"?
@LaserScheme
uh huh
what region?
@squirrel uhh...upstate Mastodon?
@LaserScheme
really.
well i'm from computer fairies and i've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams"
@squirrel oh, not in computer fairies, no
it's a mastodon.social expression
@LaserScheme
*chews on the burger*
y'know these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Furry Burger.
@squirrel
ohhohoho, no!
patented Laser burgers! old family recipe
@LaserScheme
for steamed hams.
@LaserScheme
yes and you call them "steamed hams" despite the fact they are obviously grilled.
@squirrel
ye-
uh-
you know, the-
one thing i should-
excuse me for one second
@squirrel
*leaves to the kitchen*
@squirrel
*returns into the dining room*
*yawns and stretches*
well, that was wonderful
a good time was had by all, i'm pooped
@LaserScheme
yes i should be gOOD LORD WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE
@squirrel
awoora 🅱️orealis?
@LaserScheme
a-
AWOORA 🅱️OREALIS?
at THIS time of the year
at THIS time of day
in THIS part of the country
LOCALIZED ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN?!
@squirrel
no actually, my kitchen is just on fire
@squirrel
yes, it's a regional dialect!