Ryusui @theryusui@computerfairi.es

the timeline is spicy today. be ready to step away from mastodon if you need to. take care of yourselves, y'all; your social media won't do it for you

I've compiled the story and added slightly more detail.

Here's the link: https://bit.ly/TheManWhoFuckedPortugal

Tech is the funniest industry and it always will be.

It's a bunch of people who think they are creatures of pure logic, but every problem they try to solve turns out to be a human problem that is inherently illogical.

The results are endlessly hysterical.

Trying to buy just one Andes Mint so you go to a hotel or a steakhouse in 1997 but the host won't let you buy it, they're like "just take it and get out of my sight." (Ep.150)

does chocolate count as a fermented food

Today I learn that before his music career took off Sir Mix-A-Lot worked in a #pinball arcade, servicing machines.

This causes me and my wife to wonder if we could arrange through Cameo or something for him to come out and do something about the drop targets on our Tri-Zone.

(There is nothing to be done about the drop targets on any Tri-Zone.)

Watching Jurassic Park with the kid like, "Don't worry, that cow's an actor."

24 pieces of life advice from Werner Herzog, incl. "carry bolt cutters everywhere" and "take revenge if need be". https://kottke.org/15/01/24-pieces-of-life-advice-from-werner-herzog

Not everyone was kung fu fighting. I was busy constantly repairing my fruit cart. Some of us had families to support.

Remember even if WotC releases a more reasonable OGL 1.1 they've shown their true colors. #OpenDnD

Networking 101

As of yesterday, I have been 7 months on HRT ​ and today I've been together with my partner for 6 months! ❤️

I really hate "self-documenting code" because it's just The Emperor's New Documentation.

Programming code is a communication medium and if you're a good programmer what you're communicating is what the machine does, not how smart you think you are. Tell them what you're gonna tell them (write fucking comments!), tell them (write your code as clear and as simple as possible), and then tell them what you told them (validate constraints and assumptions with assertions).

Idk but I think I'm enjoying being a cat

I'm still a sheep, of course, but in a cat way

Diablo is a Vampire Survivorslike

being forced to join a discord for tech support and immediately seeing that the whole chat history is just other people showing up, asking the question you came to the server to ask, and being told to check the pins

please just make an FAQ on your website

The great thing about J. K. Simmons is that "J. K. Simmons" totally sounds like it would be the name of a fictional character played by J. K. Simmons

Why do birds
Suddenly appear
Every time
You are near?
Just like me
You’re secretly
Made of bread

Since there are no ads on Mastodon, I am offering to advertise for any companies on here. My only requirements are:

1. I get to write the ad.

2. The ad will in no way accurately portray your company and might state that you were responsible for the Cuban Missile Crisis.

3. For each post you must pay me $10,000 and write me a handwritten note that says I am your best friend.

4. You must put out an official statement stating that you take full responsibility for the Cuban Missile Crisis.