Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

so... how 'bout that ditch then boris?

@codl shush, we're trying to keep that bit quiet

it's just as well hedgehogs are cute

you'd be amazed and appalled by just how much shite can come out such a smol critter

@mavica *comes in with emergency octo-hugs and pets*

you're the best bun and you're lovely

@mavica basically a virgin bloody mary

there's a surfing lake opening in bristol soon (it's a lake with wave generators in it)

first thing to ride a wave there?

a swan

https://twitter.com/CarveMag/status/1185867018295304193

@twitter@mastodon.technology introducing Clapper 2.0!

the latest in IoT tech it connects to the internet and streams all the audio it hears to the cloud so it can listen for something that sounds like a clap

all the other audio data is deleted

honest

@mavica I mean, being a watch nerd I see a lot of rich people bullshit around but this is just incredible

I... jesus fuck

https://old.reddit.com/r/rolex/comments/dlpl9m/i_finally_got_the_call/

Steel sports Rolex watches have incredibly long waiting lists to buy (because Rolex want to maintain their prices and have their watches be "exclusive" and they heavily limit the number they make)

So this guy made his local distributor a full commercial, for free, in the hopes of a chance of buying this from them at full price

This is everything that's wrong with Rolex fans right here

@mavica @Linda yeah, that would be a bit of a faff, possibly worth it though depending on how much jelly you intend to make

@mavica @Linda think I'd want a plastic one so it can double up as a jelly mould

@colon_three in a statement “Chick-fil-A has already proved very popular with our guests and we are happy to be able to provide this quality food expense as an option.”

quality... food... chick fillet?

@mavica mornin' mavi!

me, 11 minutes ago: WOO! MUTHAFUCKIN TIME TRAVEL YO!

@Spacegeneral "I'm gonna need wisdom checks for all y'all right now"

@mavica to me it sounds a bit like telling a person living on the streets "at least you don't have to pay council tax"