Harp the Wigglytuff @wigglytuffitout@computerfairi.es

truly, Erato remains the most inscrutable of the muses

me: writing is too hard, i wish i could write, i wonder where my writing brain is

writing brain: sup bitch it's me

me: hooray!!! so about that next chapter of -

writing brain: no time to talk we need to make several thousand words of Leon Kennedy getting sex pollen'd with Mr. X despite watching like half an episode of a playthru of the remake and not playing any resident evil games ourselves whatsoever

me: but

me: wait

me: why

PLEASED NOISES

now if only i could shave my legs lmao

well hot diggity, that's unexpected but exciting

i ordered some rainbow knee socks off aliexpress all "i bet these won't stretch at all... but i can still scrunch them up and be cute!" and They Actually Fit Wtf

nota bene: just as how not every male person who uses technology, or is in technology, is a tech bro, not every man who uses linux is a linux bro.

a bro who uses linux boots up his computer and uses linux.

a Linux Bro burbles in the cesspit of the internet, thinks "being clever enough to install linux" is a sign he is a glorious chosen one with infallible intellect, and never stops to consider "hm, what if i'm wrong, actually?"

i do have a sudden urge to watch Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade tho

which is far from a perfectly politic movie, but is quite satisfying in a campy way

linux bros gotta be linux bros i suppose

AAAAAAANYway

i keep reading 'two wolves' but in the cadence of 'two trucks' https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WchseC9aKTU

but also if you have dry lips at night, especially if you wear a cpap or similar, just trust me, get some of the laneige lip sleeping mask

it's creamy and sinks in and actually helps your lips out instead of just sitting on top being petroleum goopy or waxy, isn't assbutt levels of expensive when compared to other overnight lip treatments, and they even give you a wee silicone spatula if you don't like using your finger to get it out of the pot

i'm scared both because i'm not sure how down with snail mucus i am, as a squeamish westerner, but also

i'm scared that if i use the snail face mask and it works REALLY REALLY FANTASTICALLY i have to go "well fuck, i'm now one of those fucking asian skincare snobs i guess"

i actually have two snail face masks i should try out but, dear reader, i am Slightly Scared

the internet: answering anonymous questions is so fun!!! here's my curiouscat/etc etc come ask me questions!!!!! :>>>

me, someone who was fat in middle school where there was also a laptop program and we all had internet access: Hm, Y'all Have Fun, But For Me, Personally, Not In A Million Fucking Years

note that this is one of those times where it started out a shitpost but i honest to god do desire this object, because summer is here in georgia, i am dying of heat, and i know that my spoonie, sick, in pain ass can't twist myself into the pretzels required to shave my own legs

concept: one of those lawnmowing robots, but in miniature, so that i can just prop up my legs and let it sort out shaving them

anyway the one true kink that matters is someone adoring and loving you with genuine, humble respect, not as just one facet, or even a few facets, but as your whole, gestalt entity, as the sum of all parts, of all thoughts, interests, and so on, truly allowing you to be vulnerable and open, and receiving such in return, all the gates flung wide so that souls can mingle freely

don't at me you know i'm right

NOTE:

"but i'm not a straight man so-"

YOU

DO

NOT

GET

A

FREE

PASS.

ACTING AS IF YOU ARE ENTITLED TO DEHUMANIZE WOMEN AND THAT THEY SHOULD BE HONORED TO BE ON THE RECEIVING END WILL MAKE ME STILL WANT TO PRY OPEN YOUR EYES AND DELICATELY SLICE YOUR EYEBALLS TO RIBBONS WHILE YOU ARE RESTRAINED AND CAN ONLY SCREAM.

if your bbw kink is justified with "but the fatties should be honored by this because i'm doing them a FAVOR by fetishizing them!", and you solidly consider bbw as a way to dehumanize fat women, and not consider their humanity in the least, and laugh at them for asking for consideration because WELL NOBODY ELSE IS GONNA SLEEP WITH YA FATTY:

i sincerely, truly hope you dine on broken glass and spend the next four weeks dying slowly and painfully.