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Zandorp the Foolish

A white man with a waxed mustache and red plaid flannel button-up sits in his minimalist industrial style living room sipping kombucha and staring at his succulent collection. He sighs and pulls out his phone from his Carhartt pants pocket, taking a deep breath before speaking.

"Siri, can you show me a yoga flow that will save my marriage?"

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Zandorp the Foolish

My big issue with my fellow furs is they use the same 10 species and make some up but they don't use the greatest animal species of them all

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Zandorp the Foolish

I drew another booooyyy

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Zandorp the Foolish

Pole dancing 

I drew my boooyyy!

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a bug

I was not aware that glasses have genders

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garfield

I got 69/69 at the Bechtel test by letting all women talk to each other

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💕 Monster Girl Enthusiast 💕

Boost this and I’ll assign you your very own animal side kick

(No bugs but yes reptiles)

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Pripyat_Girlmouse.kpp

my grand plan to get rich when I was lil was to buy skittles dot com when the internet was new n sell it to the company that made em for millions of dollars n part of me still thinks that's possible lol what is up w that

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Zandorp the Foolish

Maybe me constantly saying i don't exist is wishful thinking :blobhyperthink: :blobhyperthink: :blobhyperthink: :blobthinking: :blobthinkingeyes: :blobthinkingcool: :blobthonkang: :blobthinkingsmirk:

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MOVED TO vantablack@beach.city
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🐘 wholesome🧙toots :horsiefied:

feet pic

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attractive nuisance

being personally threatened by several dozen mastodon instance admins because i tootred that i was,, "Hornt for lasagana", on jorts dot Horse, whcih they've now ""blocked""

fukc you, fuck you, i will never surrender, it's a legitimate medical condition,, eat my ass,

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🌸

300 years ago you had to date an artist to get a decent lewd of yourself

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Zandorp the Foolish

Few things will make me cry out in frustration than Adrien telling Marinette that she's her friends' every day Ladybug

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Zandorp the Foolish

New Years???? More like New TEARS hahahahaha (this is a cry for help)

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Zandorp the Foolish

My life is like a twisted house of mirrors where my dreams get twisted into nightmares in real time

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Zandorp the Foolish

New years angstxiety 

I love my girlfriend, i repeat to myself as i prepare for this new years party and secretly wish to disappear

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General Zellativity

The singular form of "amoeba" is "amiibo".

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Zandorp the Foolish

What do you do when both you and your girlfriend are really anxious and indecisive people and one of us really doesn't wanna do something but the other one really does and we keep tryna make the other person happy and make the call on their comfort and we keep going and going in circles and we just gotta make a decision but neither of us wants to???

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General Zellativity

Thinking about becoming canon

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Zandorp the Foolish

I feel like i have sufficiently attention-whored now

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Zandorp the Foolish

Could i get some hashtag on this hashtag i hashtag
Just what you expect from this hashtag

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