Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

@maple @softgoat a game of "wrestler or male porn star name?" I believe

@maple @softgoat jad?

@somarasu wasn't that the show where, canonically, moses parted the red sea with a spinning top?

@maple we'll have to get the olbas oil out for you, that's usually good for stuffy noses

and wrap you in a blanket of course, that's just standard

@maple maple music is best music

If there are any #brands that want me to shill your product, please send me a crate of it and I might shill for you

(I won't)

(Unless you're Sinn, I will shill the shit out of Sinn watches from now 'til eternity)

Got a flyer for Domino's Pizza through the post

Why the hell does anyone buy these things?

A medium pizza costs 14/15 quid.

A MEDIUM

For the USAians that's 18/19 bucks for a medium pizza

@maple see this is the advantage of having robot friends

you just put in a s/original/new and they don't notice it's changed!

@noelle well, with all the "trebuchet terf" twitts on twitter we did indeed fight the law

@zane those are both very good opinions

I'd disagree with soviet watches always being the best but for the price they're pretty bloody good

I know there isn't much of the demo that would buy a rolex around here (and if there is stop hoarding all the money), but bears stating regardless

Don't bother buying a Rolex (unless you really really want one)

Other companies make cooler watches for far less money and you don't even have to sit on a waiting list for months to get one

@maple real robot whomst beep!

@transbian@masto.ninja this is really super mega good

@batterpunts the cats have all learned that the food there isn't for them, as far as any other smol wild critters they're also welcome

People who come on to a platform, ignore the rules, get booted off, and then complain about it elsewhere are the social media equivalent of sovereign citizens