Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

@OhMyGodMyKnees@mastodon.social @Taweret@octodon.social not the shooting, the FBI are at the centre of a vast conspiracy that Las Vegas exists

Like Bielefeld

lots of cruise ships include shopping sections

therefore it could be considered a mall

therefore we could combine "living in a dead mall" with "being a pirate" if we got hold of an old, unused cruise ship

also, we could move it around the world for easy pickup of all our friends

@noelle yeah

"sergeant, why is that thing twice as large as it was five minutes ago?"

"uhh... we tried the miniguns... it's uh... got more armour now"

@noelle inspired: additive armour

katamari damacy but with getting shot at

@er1n happy not your birthday!

An SEO webmaster walks into a bar, public house, tavern, pub, club, menu, beer garden, pool table, darts, games, snacks

@noelle possibly briefly

"Oh hey, civil rights act passed, hell, you had a black president, fuck yeah"
"uh also we elected this guy right after"
"dude what the fuck?"

@vantablack Operation BEGANMINE

(from the NSA-style random name generator I keep around for naming things)

@maple *soff octohugs* hope you start feeling better soon, bun

@natalie@masto.ninja @Jo yeah, it's getting signifICANNtly harder to come up with stuff

@natalie@masto.ninja @Jo I'm not sure icann deal with many more like that one

@Jo yep

fuck 'em, we'll make our own DNS

with .blackjack and .hookers

@Jo yes, owned by SC Johnson unfortunately so your dreams of fuck.off are sadly unlikely

@bunnylyn that is adorable, I love it

@softgoat Yankee Candle

Not bad in and of itself but imagine the tie-in products

hedgie fren!

Just who's this Malone person everyone's trying to get mailed places?

BEES ARE GOOD BEES ARE GOOD
ALL OF THESE BEES ARE GOOD

@maple beepy girl